Tips for Buying Gifts for Disabled Kids

In this episode, we are sharing A LOT of gift ideas for disabled kids.  These ideas are from us, our kids, our Raising Disabled Parent Group (ask us how you can join and help with future episodes) and our listeners.

We talked about so many great ideas for kids with so many different disabilities but here are some of the specific ones that we love with links:

Quadstick Adaptive Video Game Controller
Nugget Couch
The Butterfly Pig Dolls and Medical Accessories
Tonies
Billy Footwear
Linkimals
Z-Vibe Kits from Ark Therapeutic Products

Books about Inclusion or with Disabled Characters:

We're All Wonders by R.J. Palacio
I'm Basically A Unicorn by Melanie Hawkins
The Wonderful Way You Are by Sarah Elizabeth Brooks
Let's Go Play by Shelby McCarthy
The Day God Made You by Rory Feek
Who Do You See When You Look At Me by Angela Ray Rodgers
Jessica's Box by Peter Carnavas

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Transcript

Deonna:

 Hey, y’all, welcome to Raising Disabled. So today we want to talk about gift ideas for disabled kids, and we're going to give you a couple of ideas about how to buy gifts for a disabled child. We're talking about ideas that our girls like, and then we also are sharing a bunch of really great ideas from our Raising Disabled parent group.

And this is a group you can join if you're a parent of a disabled child. You just have to reach out to us and we can add you to that group. And we ask them questions all the time and they basically are what is a huge part of what is making this good. And then we also have our Instagram account @raisingdisabledpodcast and some people reached out to us there too.

And so we're just going to kind of talk about Christmas. And so Rhandyl, do you get anxiety when people start asking what Remi wants for Christmas or for her birthday or something?  

Rhandyl:

I used to, but not really anymore I feel like I get more anxiety when people ask me what I want for the holidays or my birthday than..

Deonna:

Oh, I got a long list for that. 

Rhandyl:

Yeah. I always get caught off guard because I, I think it's motherhood in general, but I'm constantly thinking about what my kids need and not really what I need. So it's, but it's a good time to reflect and figure out what, I actually want, it's usually now it's like self care type things. I'm like, oh, just give me all the massages and… but as far as Remi I used to get anxiety because if you look up on Amazon or Google “toddler gift ideas” or whatever. I mean, she could have cared less about any of that stuff. 

So, yeah. But now I just focus on her interests at the time and that changes, you know, it's changed a lot over the years, but.. I always recommend  and people have learned now to not just go out on a limb and get something that they think that she might like, I get a lot of people that'll ask me for ideas.  Which I very much appreciate that because everybody wants to get something that someone's going to like and so if they ask me what she what she's into that's gonna change year to year and sometimes it doesn’t. She still loves her Disney movies and all that, like she has forever, but I would say a first tip that I would give to someone that's looking to buy a gift for a disabled kid would be to ask and  listen to the parents ideas.

Yeah. But also use your own creativity. They don't have time to go into full details on exactly what to get them. I mean, yeah, sure, if they have something saved in their Amazon wishlist, they could just send it to you. Yeah. But you know what I mean. Just be creative, but also it's nice to kind of get an idea of what they're into at the time.

Deonna:

That's not a bad idea to have an Amazon wish list for your kids because I mean, I even forget ideas I've had for Allie or even my son. So that's actually a good idea They can just go in there and get it and when it's gone, it's gone. So yeah I like that idea.

Rhandyl:

I actually, I should do a wish list, but I actually just I go in and put it in my cart, and then I save it for later, and then I'll send it to whenever someone asks for an idea, I’ll just like send them a link.

Deonna:

That's a good idea, I’m copying that. And if Amazon doesn't have it, does anyone really need it? So yeah. That's basically, I started my shopping yesterday and it was so much Amazon stuff. I'm like, I've forgotten there are other stores that exist on this planet, but gotta go get all that other stuff too.

I agree with that too. I mean, I like it when people ask me, you know, what is she into? I don't always necessarily have the time to tell everyone exactly what to get her. And I do love it when somebody does go that extra mile and uses what I said and gets them something really cool that connects with what I said. So it's, it's like a fun surprise to me too, to see what people get.  

Our next tip is just to make something ordinary fun and what I mean by that is like, let's say that your kid needs new sheets and we're going to talk about this here in a little bit about how sometimes you can disguise a need as a gift, which we all do as parents that, well all parents. But like, if Allie wants new sheets or if we're getting her new sheets for her bed, we'll get her ones that she really loves that are really fun for her. Or like one of her nurses, Heidi, just gave her this beach towel that is Animal Crossing, which is our favorite thing in our house and she was so excited. I mean, it was just a beach towel.

But she took that, she took what she knows about us, that Allie loves Animal Crossing and she just applies it to something ordinary, like a towel. And all of a sudden it's the best gift ever, and we have to use that towel every single day. I'm constantly washing that towel. And so I think that's a good way to get a kid a gift is just think of something ordinary, like a water bottle or whatever, and make it fun.  

Rhandyl:

Like t-shirt, pajamas, something like that. That's yeah. All good ideas and kids all need those things. So yeah, and so disabled kids, most of the time they need supplies or equipment. I would say 95 percent of the time insurance covers the big things that stuff, but there  are cases where , there's, Only an allotted amount that insurance will pay, and then there's some leftover that families are trying to save up for, or they have to seek out other funds. And so that's an idea. A lot of people aren't going to share that. A close family member will probably know that need. Or if they do share it, that's an idea to help financially, if you're able, for something like that, that the kid needs. 

Deonna:

Well, and we know it's not as fun as these little stuffed animals or things like that. But I mean, the kid is not going to be that excited. Yeah. No. Yeah. But, I mean, we have a similar.  Oh, for sure. Like, we have a similar situation where we wanted this stroller thing that is also a bike trailer, so Allie could be pulled behind one of our bikes. Yeah. And, but those are things that we don't necessarily, like, need, but it's fun. 

And so things like that, if you are willing to do something like that, that would be huge for a family. But yeah, I mean, $20 isn't going to get you too far on a lot of these things. These are bigger ticket items for sure. Yeah. 

Yeah. Another thing we, This is kind of a tip, is just to ignore what other kids their age are into, or what they like, or what their interests are, because typically, and this might be too big of a blanket statement, but typically a disabled kid is not going to be on par with their peers in terms of likes, interests, things like that. Even my daughter, who is cognitively the same as her peers, It just, it's just different and I don't know how to explain it, but maybe it was the trauma she went through. She's still latching on to things that she liked two years ago. But yeah you know, like we were at Halloween the other night and her friends are dressed up as Wednesday, and Barbie, and Taylor Swift, and Allie was Bingo from the show Bluey. So we're not quite on the same maturity as far as like interests and stuff go. And so you can't, you know..

Rhandyl:

I think you're right as far as I think just in general disabled children, most of the time are not into whatever age appropriate toys that typical kids are into, or, No. Not just toys, but just, like you said, likes and interests. Yeah. So just it’s best to ask.

Deonna:

Oh, it's best to ask. And there's this Instagram account that we all follow and the mom has a disabled son and her teenage son likes Elmo. She had mentioned one time how people were thinking, Oh, he likes Elmo. He's too old to like Elmo or whatever. And she was just like, you know, he likes Elmo. If you want to get him something he likes, that is what he likes. And I remember thinking, okay, that, you know, it sort of gave me permission for Allie to like something that is not quite exactly on par with what her friends are doing and it's okay. And it makes them happy, and that's, at the end of the day, what Christmas and birthday gifts and all that are about, so, yeah, just don't, don't worry about that.  

Rhandyl:

I think Remi was probably close to three years old before she even attempted to play with a toy, yeah. And so the first few Christmases, I don't know, it kind of bummed me out that people would get her toys and she could care less, but then once you finally figured it out, it was, it was amazing and, and it was exciting, but, yeah, like you said it just accept what your child is into and just go with that because that's what's gonna make them happy.  

Yeah, and so another fun gift is experience gifts. So obviously this is gonna be very child specific like there's no triggers and things that. You know, you’re not gonna want to get a child that hates loud noises movie ticket or for example, like, if they don't like crowds, I wouldn't, get them a ticket to an amusement park, Disney Live or something like that. Yeah. Like, yeah. Just yeah. So you just have to obviously know the child before you purchase something like that as a gift. Cause there's definitely different capabilities and sensory triggers and things like that. Right. Those are  awesome gift ideas. As long as you know what the kiddos into and…

Deonna:

..and the parents can tell you my kid hates this, my kid loves this. I mean, they can really tell you real quick whether something's going to be right or not. So that's us anyways. Yeah, for sure. 

Another idea is you know, screen time is something that parents of disabled kids, we just use it. We can't avoid it. And I don't think you're ever going to hear a parent of a disabled child be judgmental about screen time because it's our sanity, and it helps our kids have independence and things like that. That's probably a whole other episode in itself, but anything that can enhance screen time for our kids, whether that's some subscription, or if the kid, maybe the kid has Netflix and Disney, but it doesn't have Hulu, or, you can add on something else they can do.

I know my daughter has seen every show ever made since the dawn of time. And so we're running out of ideas for that. Anything like that games, iPad games. I know there's so many disabled kids who their iPad is their everything, and just getting them some new games for it or just anything is huge for them. It doesn't have to be like a physical thing you hold. It can be just a subscription to something.

Rhandyl:

Yeah, so for a lot of disabled kids sensory items, that's a real broad term, but some kids are  Very interested in lights and bright things like visual type sensory um, things. Some kids that are visually impaired like the lights, they may not be able to see clearly, but  they can see lights changing and things like that. And so and then also some kids are very into sounds. So you can get these little buttons that you can push and make silly sounds or record certain sounds and they can just easily push a button and get that audio input that they love.

And then also a lot of kids love, different things that they can touch and feel, like, different textures, but some kids obviously hate that. So all these sensory things are super kid specific. All of these gift ideas are kid specific, but definitely when it comes to anything that's really, either really loud, or bright, or gooey, or itchy, or, you know, soft. You just, all those things can be, like, very stimulating to kids. And then some of them, it can be very triggering. So, if you're going to buy something like that, just obviously make sure it's not a trigger.

Like, for example when Remi was little, her thing was, her first thing was lights. So anything with lights, she was super into, and then it kind of went to sound and lights, and then she hated texture, so I mean, it took her years to play with Play Doh, and now she'll play with it, but, And there's just still certain little things that.. 

Deonna:

I think that Play Doh is so gross. I am with her on that. That's funny. I hate, I hate the smell of it, and I hate the way it feels. It's so gross. And I was a teacher, so Play Doh was out. I'm like when Kinetic Sand became a thing, I'm like, yes, thank you. 

Rhandyl:

Kinetic Sand is awesome. Yeah. I know. But anyway, so those are just, you know, that's just very broad sensory type things. But some kids, that is life. And then some kids, there's just, you just have to know, you just have to know and always ask. But that can be a hit. Like you can get a child the most amazing play set and you hand them a fidget toy or like kinetic sand and it will be the best gift ever. So you just never know. 

So, what are some ideas that you have for Allie this year for Christmas?

Deonna:

Yeah. so, Allie if you don't know, Allie is a quadriplegic. So, no arm movement, no leg movement, which makes gift buying challenging. I remember her first Christmas after this happened, we were still in the ICU and everything, and people just bought her whatever they wanted, like stuff that they probably had already gotten her. I mean, it was one of the worst days of my life. I just remember opening up all these presents that made sense three months ago, but didn't anymore. It was horrible. She got a Barbie dream house and we still have it and now her friends play with it with her. But I hated that stupid barbie dream house. We were putting it together in the hall of the ICU and i'm like cursing Santa I was just so annoyed that I'm having to put this together, without Dane, so it was because it was covid and everything.

Oh, man.  I hated that day. And so now I'm a little more careful about what I even allow people to give her, or there's lots of times people will give her something and I'm like, oh, thank you and then I get rid of it because it doesn't make sense at all for us to keep in the house. But, but yeah, like, Allie is my stuffed animals girl. She loves stuffed animals and we got over 120 stuffed animals when she was in the hospital. So we don't have all those still, but our rule, yeah, I'm like, no, she would keep them all. For reals. Of course.  Our rule is if you get a new stuffed animal, one has to go. That's sort of our way of keeping it just under control.

Yeah. But, That's a good rule. She really, Yeah. She really does love stuffed animals and of all her favorite characters. She loves clothes for her American Girl doll. And thank goodness you can get them cheaper on Amazon, like knockoffs of American girl clothes and so she does like like this week.

She's been on a kick where we have to redress the doll every morning to coordinate with what she's got going on. And it's funny, but so the nurses and they're like the nurses and they're having to get the doll ready too. I'm like, come on, let's go get the doll ready. But she loves to match her doll, like you can buy, and I think a lot of disabled kids would think this is fun, like, if they have a doll or something, there's a lot of options, even on Amazon, or American Girl's pricey, but on Amazon where you can have the same pajama as your doll, she thinks stuff like that is fun.

And  she loves to match grown ups. She thinks it's so fun when me and her have the same clothes on, and so I'll buy her the same clothes as me if I can, or, you know, things like that. Oh, that's cute. And so she does think stuff like that's fun, to match another person that she loves. Yeah. 

And so, Allie plays video games with a device called a QuadStick and I can link that in the show notes, but that's a adaptive video game controller. And there's actually a lot of adaptive video controllers. If you ever wanted to look in that, if you thought a disabled kid would want to get into gaming. But we have one and she loves new video games, there's a video game coming out here pretty soon that is Bluey, and so that's on her list, and so we're, and video games are a great gift, I mean and they're kind of expensive, so it's kind of a nice thing for parents when someone else buys that,

But, um, but, she, she likes gift cards, too. You know, like ice cream places. There's this place in Lubbock called Holly Hop’s. Have you ate there before? Like the little ice cream? 

Rhandyl:

Oh, yeah. We've had, we had one of Remi's birthday parties there. Oh my gosh. Yeah, we love Holly Hop’s. It's amazing.

Deonna:

It's like a 50s diner ice cream shop thing. But I mean, if you gave Allie a gift card in that place, she'd be all over that. So, you know, just places like that. 

Rhandyl:

We should go there together. We should take the girls there because Remi loves it too. And yeah. We should.

Deonna:

Oh, it's so good. I get like a big Frito pie and then a big ol’ Coke float and then later I'm like, why do I feel…Yeah. How did I do that to myself? Oh well. 

But and she, like I said, she does like the ordinary things that are in her favorite characters. Like, if you get her sheets or pillowcases or towels, t shirts, pajamas, anything that matches her thing, like right now she's into Hello Kitty. So we're getting her some Hello Kitty things. I mean, she just loves stuff like that. And so, and I think I love Hello Kitty too so I'm all about that.  

She loves hair accessories. And I think that is if a, if a kid will allow you to do their hair, which I know is not always the case, as you've said, but but I mean, even getting them fun, like scrunchies and hair accessories, and if they'll if they're cool with that, that's something we like, but I've gotten really good at doing wheelchair hair, so.You know, I've got all the things for that. But we do that. 

And then she does like stuff like movie tickets, going to see shows or Broadway plays, like we just went and saw Lion King and those things are really good ideas for someone like Allie. Now for somebody who, now Allie does wear the headphones. If you've ever watched my videos, she doesn't like sounds. Like, she didn't, it didn't bother her before her injury, so we're not sure if that's a neuro thing, but we always have those big headphones on everywhere we go that's going to be loud. But they're in cute colors and stuff that she likes, so even stuff like that, you know, don't get them just the plain old black thing, get, like, get them something fun that they actually want and like.

And then the last thing, this is kind of a Idea for kids who.. now Allie's not mobile anymore, but we have a Nugget, which I can link that to. And it's like that couch that breaks apart into six different play pieces basically. And we had that before Allie got hurt, but it's really nice now because we can lay it in the floor and her therapists can do all of her therapy on this soft surface; they're not on the ground. And it can be used for other things too with your other kids or whatever you want to do. And most kids are not like Allie, most kids are playing and moving around. And I've heard that it's really great for therapy to walk on that cause it's a difficult surface to walk on. And there's all these different ways you can configure it. And so that's also, I think they have like knockoff versions of it now at Costco and things like that, but I do love the nugget for therapy reasons and it's just a fun big gift too. I think they're like a couple hundred bucks, but that's an idea for most, a lot of disabled kids would like that. Yeah. 

Rhandyl:

Like you said, they're using it for stretching and range of motion and things like that with Allie and then, like, I use those even with my mobile kids, like you said, for dynamic surfaces stepping up and down, jumping down, jumping on something, so when they fall, either falling on something soft. Things like that, it's a fun, adaptable, long term type gift for sure.

Deonna:

And it's nice too because when people come to visit you they can sleep on it like kids can sleep on them I mean, they really are a very, very great thing to have in the house. No matter what. Yeah. So, what are you getting Remi? 

Rhandyl:

Well, I have a list of things that I think that she'll be into. Sometimes I get really excited about something like for example her birthday. I think I've just always wanted her to be into dolls for some reason. Yeah, and she just doesn't care. I don't know. It's just funny but I got I I went all out on her birthday. And I got this doll that looks like her and it's not a doll. I got it from a company called Butterfly Pig, and they make all these accessories for disabled or medically complex kids. I've heard of this. Yeah, so I, yeah, it's awesome. So, I didn't end up getting, , the pretend trach and the pretend g tube. Like, I just used some of her old ones, and I was able to put it on the doll but this doll has  her hair and bangs, her eyes, and then um, I got all sorts of outfits on Amazon, like you said, for it, and then on the Butterfly Pig they have like little play ventilators, they have little communication devices which I got, I got that and then a little AFO  thing. Yeah. Feeding palms, they have, they have  AFOs. So I got these really cute, like purple iridescent AFOs for the baby doll. And then all these cute outfits and, I think she liked, like,  whenever we opened it, and every time she sees it, like, she smiles, but, she's, she's not into playing with it. Yeah. And we're, so we utilize it some for occupational therapy- where she has to help dress her. But she doesn't really seem that interested. But it's a really cool even for siblings, like, younger siblings. Getting them a doll that looks like their sibling and they can pretend to give medicine or do the feeding pump or the vent, you know, it's a great gift for not just your disabled child, but the siblings or cousins or friends or, you know what I mean? It's, it's a really cool idea. But, so that's just something…

Deonna:

I need to look into that. That sounds so cute. And I think with, like, my daughter, it'd be fun for her friends to pretend to do these things that they've seen us do to Allie. So that'd be cool. 

Rhandyl:

Yeah. And kind of our big thing that she's been into over the last year or so is the Toniebox and the Tonies. And it's kind of it's fairly new in the past couple of years. But you put these little figurines and they're Disney characters and different show characters. And you have it linked to wifi and an app, but each figurine basically, once you scan it in it configures with your kid's specific Toniebox, which is just a speaker.

But on top, it has like this little area where you put the figurine, and it plays, like for example, we have Baloo from the Jungle Book, and you set him on top, and it plays all the songs from the Jungle Book. Then it basically tells the story of the jungle book, like a  summary of the movie after it plays all the songs. So it's awesome and we use it a lot for therapies for motivation. So we'll like, okay,  you can stand up and then pick which Tonie you want to put on your box and then we can listen to the song. We use it for just motivational things and then just for fun, too.

And then something.. so like Allie and Remi and a lot of disabled kids have AFOs, ankle foot orthotics, and so those are hard to find shoes for. So there's various brands of adaptive shoes  that are easy to get on and off with the AFOs. And so she's wearing those a lot more now. And so used to just any shoe, cute shoe she could wear, but now that she's wearing her AFOs more, we really are kind of limited to shoes. And they're not always cheap. So, no. So  I've got some shoes on the Christmas list this year.

But some fun things, they’re called linkimals. They're more like for toddlers, younger kids, little light up toys. And basically, you push the buttons and they light up and they dance. But, we only have one, and she loves it. And so, I'm wanting to get her a few more. Because from what I've read on them and heard, you can link them all together and when you start playing with one, the others will turn on and they start singing in harmony and like making what, like doing specific dances together. That's cool. I think Remi is going to love that. 

So I'm always trying to find something that's highly motivating for her because she has to be highly motivated to  which, I mean, all kids are like this, but she’s to the extreme. Doing any of her therapies, she needs to be very motivated. Yeah. And so, yeah I'm hoping to get some of those for her. And then she's really motivated by audible sounds and funny sounds or songs. And so sound books are always good. But we wear those out so quickly. Especially between her and my son, they just like push the buttons over and over and over and over. But yeah, so sound books that play songs or make the animal noises, those are always a good idea. 

And then like you said earlier, gift cards are a great idea. She loves movies, so just streaming app gift cards for movie purchases or show purchases. But, it seems like every year there's something new she's into, and , I can always come up with ideas now. It's not as hard as it used to be.  

 Other ideas that we've used over the years or thinking about like patients that I've had in the past whenever it comes to good gift ideas. Weighted blankets are great for some kiddos and they're making a lot more now that you can find a lot easier. 

Deonna:

They’re not as expensive as they were.

Rhandyl:

Yeah, they used to be. outrageous. Like you said earlier, the nugget, there's all sorts of positioning and support chairs out there. And then just simple things like bubbles. I, I don't know why, but so many kids, no matter if they're disabled or not being bubbles, no matter what time of year it is, they're so highly motivating and they're cheap and fun. Bubble machines make it easier for the caregivers too.

Deonna:

I need a good bubble machine. Because when Allie's in the shower, I'm like, how fun would that be for bubble machines to be going? Ooh, yeah! It'd be all over us, but, you know, okay with it.  

Rhandyl:

That would be fun. Just, like I said earlier, some sensory things, fidget toys. They make these I call them chewies. I'm sure speech pathologists have a better way of calling them something they're, you know, for yeah, it's for oral sensory kids. They make these fun different textures, whether it's firm or soft things that are safe for them to chew on. And so, that's an idea. And then things that can, help support their different therapies. So, like, scooter boards are really good for therapists to even sit on when they're trying to gait train. Kids sit on them and they can move themselves around if they're able to. That's fun. It's good for balancing all sorts of things you could use a scooter board for.

A floor mat, kind of like you said, with a nugget couch, a floor mat is always great, especially if you have hard floor. And especially for littles that working on, motor skills with doing that on a floor mat, a sanitary surface that you can clean and wipe off, but it's also not hard. And a fold up mat that can be like a floor mat, but also you can fold it up and then it can be a step or a prop or you know.. That would be, that's also helpful for different positioning, sitting, kneeling, things like that.

Deonna:

And like that's even how we use the nugget a little bit. Like that's how we use the nugget is you fold it up and then all of a sudden you can be doing a sitting position. So I mean those, those are really great.

Rhandyl:

 Yeah. And  depending on what your child's doing, I'm just thinking, for example, like things that we've used for occupational therapy, they make these cool things. Now these sensory bins you used to could only  either make them or find them on Etsy. And now they have. A bunch of options on Amazon too and they're a little cheaper but they're  these sensory bins and the sand in it is  real soft and colorful and it you basically make like ice cream cones with it and it has a scoop and it's fun. And there's these pretend sprinkles and it's cool. So there's so many options now for these little sensory bins.

Yeah, and just like puzzles and shape sorters. And then, if your kid's into coloring but they need help holding, there's all sorts of adaptable writing utensils and things that can help them hold their markers or whatever they're using. And water beads are really fun, and cheap. They  grow  so big compared to what they start out with. I remember the first time I made those, I was like, Whoa, that's wild! And then it's like those poke a dot books that have the little buttons,  it gives you that audible and the sensory, when they touch it. So I think those are, I see a lot of kids using those poke a dot books and they're fun. Yeah, so, those are just some random ideas that I thought of that could be fun and also helpful during therapies as well.  

Deonna:

Yeah, well, and we also had a lot of people suggest different books. And so we aren't mentioning any of those specifically, but we can try to find a few. And if you ever have any that you like, please tell us. But we. We can share some books that share kids that are different. Like Allie has one that has a kid in a wheelchair and I've been happy to see regular books having kids in wheelchairs lately. Mm-Hmm. . 'cause I'm like, look, it's like you. And she's like, it's a boy. I am like, okay, well you get it there in a wheelchair. Yeah. She's like, how does he not like me at all?

Rhandyl:

Well, we, yeah, we have a lot of different books that are super cute, like inclusion books. Yeah.   So, yeah. I, we'll definitely list some of those in our show notes because we love reading those and they're some of my son's favorite books as well so. 

Deonna:

Oh, I'm sure. He recognizes his sister in some of them. So we talked to a bunch of our friends and like I said, you can be a part of our Raising Disabled parent group. If you're the parent of a disabled kid, we all just understand each other in a way that's really cool. But we talked to a bunch of these parents and they gave us some ideas.

And so we're gonna read through a few of these and our first one is Ruby. Ruby's in our group  I love her. But she was talking about the Billy shoes as a gift. And Billy shoes are those shoes we were talking about that are adaptive and it’s..Like, Allie doesn't walk with AFOs on, so she doesn't really need them because of the AFOs. But even kids who don't have good control of their legs I never realized how much your kid was helping you put their shoes on until Allie was not helping you anymore, and her foot was just there. And Allie's foot does not just go in a shoe anymore. Like it has to be sat down in the sole of the shoe and the Billy shoes zip off completely. Like the whole top zips off. You lay the foot down in there. If they have the AFOs on, you set that AFO down in there and then you zip it up over the top. So I'm pretty sure we all have these Billy shoes, but they are pricey. And It's worth it because you don't have a choice. But yeah those are a good thing to ask like grandma and grandpa for, cause they're a little pricey, but they make really cute options for them, thank goodness. And so Allie actually really likes all her shoes from there, She just got those like, they have like a fake Ugg boot, Billy. Yes. And it's so cute. We got that.

Rhandyl:

That's on our Christmas list. 

Deonna:

Yeah, we, we unfortunately had to buy all of that now because we couldn't get her foot in the shoe anymore. So we're like, Oh man, couldn't disguise it as a Christmas gift. But but she was talking about how we do have to disguise gifts. That are actually things they need. She said, like her daughter, she just did this big remodel of her daughter's room and her daughter thought that was so fun, but it was actually just to make it more accessible for a wheelchair. So I feel like parents of disabled kids are very good at hiding the needs as a fun present.

Rhandyl:

Creativity. Yeah, we have to be creative. Yeah. Mm hmm. . And like I was saying earlier, I was explaining the Tonies, Kate and Ana, they talked about the Tonies being a good option. And I think for kids, especially that are visually impaired it's, it's awesome because they're not getting the screen time, but they can actually feel the character and place it on the Toniebox and they're in control of the music coming on. It's like a whole other way of independence.These, you know, they're going to be able to tell which character is which and then they're going to be able to hear the songs and the story and it’s… I don't know if it was created for kids with disabilities, but, they're wonderful for a lot of children with disabilities.

Deonna:

Yeah, people were really into those. I actually, so many people are saying that they liked those that I ended up buying one for my nephew who's not disabled, but it just sounded so fun that I was like, I'm getting him that. 

Rhandyl

Yeah, they are fun. My son loves it too. Yeah. And I got some for my nieces and nephews. Last year and I'm pretty sure they love it too. So yeah. 

Deonna:

And they have bedtime stories too. I saw where you can. 

Rhandyl:

They do. They have bedtime stories, nursery rhymes, all sorts of stuff. Yeah. 

Deonna:

So I talked to Brooke, whose child has lissencephaly and if you want to learn more about that, you can listen to our episode where we talked to Danielle. We talked to her too, here in a second, but she said he loves all the sensory toys and they also like doing the gift cards, the memberships, the, we have a little science museum in our town called the science spectrum and somebody gave her a membership. And she said they go all the time and he just gets to go see all the things. And so they like doing that. And she said for their big present from grandparents, they're going to go visit the Dallas aquarium, which I've been there and that is really fun if your kid likes animals and fish and things like that. It's actually, it's not really an aquarium. There's like a lot of other animals. It's pretty cool.  

She also said, I thought this was really interesting. I didn't know this, but the mascot of lisencephaly is a koala and she said that koalas have lissencephaly, which I did not know that. 

But yeah, I did not know this. Like you don't think about animals having the same, no, you know, disorders as we do or whatever, but I guess they do. And she said it's fun and a lot of people know that her son. Like that that's a connection and so people will get him like koala pajamas or a nightlight and so that's kind of a neat nod to what's going on with him but those are the people you can tell really know him if they are doing these these kind of neat little things so I thought that was cute.

Rhandyl:

Yeah, that is cute. And another caregiver, Adriana, she said that her son has ADHD and ASD and OCD. She said that he likes solid figure toys, so anything that would come apart or detach creates bad reaction like it's a trigger for him. Yeah, and so, that's just another example of why it's good to ask, because the last thing you want to do is for the kid to open up the gift that you got them and freak out because of it.

Deonna:

Yeah. Oh, like hate it. Yeah. Yeah. And I think it's okay as parents to peek in there, especially if you think something could cause a massive trigger. Just peek in there real quick before you're giving it because like.. like in this mom's situation, if someone bought her son Legos, that's not going to be a good idea He's not going to like that, and so just sometimes just peeking in there and pulling things aside that might not be okay. It's, it's fine. You can do that. It's not the end of the world. Yeah. 

So another one of our friends, Timela. She said that her daughter's 23 and has autism and she loves puzzles and she loves to paint. And so that's what they do. They give her puzzles, they give her art supplies. And I love art supplies because there's just always something new you can be giving them or you know, there's just always some new cool art supply out there and they they run out. So it's, it's good that her family knows what she likes and then caters to that. They're not trying to create some new interest for her or something. They just are doing what she likes. Yeah. 

Rhandyl:

Another  mom, Anna, said that her son is deaf and developmentally delayed but he loves stuffed animals and little figures of his favorite animals or Disney characters and those are ideas that she always has for him. And then she said that they're going to try a ride on toy this year to hopefully help with learning how to steer and ride a bike and build some arm strength as well. So fun, but also therapeutic at the same time. Right. Right. Those are always good gift ideas. 

Deonna:

I know. We have to mix them together.

Our next mom is Stephanie and I follow Stephanie on Instagram. Her name's Stephanie Stanley, but I like her because she shows the behind the scenes of daily life of caring for a extremely medically complex kid- the good, the bad, and the ugly. She's not afraid to go there. So I, I appreciate her account for that, but her son had a stroke in utero, brain malformation, CP, he's vent/trach, like, you know, it's she's, she's a great caregiver. I’ll just put it that way. But. She said he likes the Zvibe from Arc Therapeutic. And so I had to look that up and it's these vibrating things for kids who like to put things in their mouth. It just vibrates and there's  a million different attachments.  

And then her son likes projection lights that go up on the ceiling and he has the skylight by BlissLights, and that's on Amazon, and Allie had that, I think we still have it and she loved it, especially when we go into the hospital, we take it in there and it makes the hospital not feel so hospitally, you know, and so, and it’s, It's really cool. It's kind of like laser. And so if you look straight into it, it can kind of get your eyes a little bit, but we have it and it's really good. And she also likes this thing called Lulla-Vibe and that's by Munchkin and that's on Amazon as well, but she said her son loves soft blankets, especially heated ones. And she said that if you buy a heated blanket from Sunbeam, which is one of the huge brands of heated blankets. That if it breaks, they'll just send you a new one and replace it. So, I thought that was cool. Wow. I mean, nobody does that ever, so, I thought that was cool too. 

Rhandyl:

Yeah, that is interesting. I'm gonna look into the Z-Vibe thing, cause Remi, she goes through these.. just really needing some oral sensory..and so I'm going to look into that. I mean, she may hate it but she may love it.

Deonna:

It was like a whole website of things. I mean, there were tons of options and attachments. I was looking at it and I was like, okay, this is neat.

But and even the heated blankets, like we have a heated blanket for Allie because she can't control her temperature anymore. So she can, like she was hypothermic two Saturdays ago. We're like, Oh my gosh, but there are also these blankets. I think we're going to get her and it's  a battery pack heated blanket. So you can have it going no matter where you are, what you're doing. So I think that might be on our list of things that aren't fun, but that me and Dane think are  good. So we're going to have to get that. 

Rhandyl:

Yeah, for sure. Veronica, she mentioned mellow plushies. Those are, if anybody doesn't know what those are, they're like these crazy soft, squishy, stuffed pillows, stuffed animals. Yeah. They're fun to cuddle with. And for those with ADHD, the poppets or fidgets, those are some sensory things that we were talking about earlier. And they're also good because they don't really make much noise. So, if you have a kiddo that's triggered by noise these fidget toys are really good. And they're small, easy travel toys, good car toys. And she says, of course, clothes and shoes are great gift ideas, like we had talked about. There's lots of custom clothing now that for kids with certain disabilities, kids that have all sorts of things. They make so many customized clothing now and those are of course not cheap. So um, anything like that they're, it's still a great gift idea, whether it's fun or not, the kids need it   

Deonna:

Even when you're buying clothes for someone in a wheelchair, for example, you don't want to buy them something that has, if they're not adjusting their body, like Allie doesn't adjust her body, so if there's buttons or a zipper on the back of her shirt, it'll cause this massive sore on her back in less than 12 hours. I mean, real quickly. And so even buying clothes, sometimes you have to ask ok, what’s you know, going to be best for their body, so yeah there’s a lot to think about. For sure.

So we talked to Danielle, whose son also has lissencephaly. She's the one that we interviewed a while back. It was called. Danielle Raising Barron, but her son has a developmental delay and vision impairments. And she said anything with lights and sounds, like we were saying earlier, light projectors, boards, a lot in sensory lights, anything that can play music that can be adapted with a switch. So there are these switches that you can put with different things. We had some of that when we were in the hospital. And then any little toy that makes sounds like a rattle and things like that.

Rhandyl:

Another caregiver, Devan said, so I guess her child has CDPX1. Which I had to look it up, and it's a genetic disorder, it’s present from birth that affects bone and cartilage development. She said he's also hearing impaired and she recommended different inclusion books that are awesome. And also she said that she's excited this year. I guess they're working on sign language and she found some, yeah, she found some alphabet finger spelling fridge magnets.

Deonna:

And then our last mom we got a response from was Heidi and Heidi's actually one of my daughter's nurses but her 16 year old daughter has developmental and intellectual disabilities and a very severe heart condition. And she said her favorite thing is hoodie onesie pajamas and that she puts them on the second she gets home and it's just this safe thing; like, I'm done with the world, and I'm home, and I'm in my onesie. And I never understood the onesie thing but on Halloween, I wore a onesie with Allie, and I get it now. Like I'm thinking, can I wear this out in public? This is so comfortable, but I was into it and I liked it. 

But but yeah, these are just some ideas and we'll try to link as many of these things in the show notes. with links if we can, if it's something that's kind of a specific thing that we mentioned, but yeah, we'll do our best. We've talked about a lot of things, but if you have anything else too, we would love for you guys to share with us your ideas because this is really hard to tell everybody what your kid needs and wants for Christmas and birthdays and every year. And so I'm hoping this will be a good resource where people can say-this is some ideas that you could use for my kid too. So. We're hoping that's what you guys can use this for. Just send them a link to this episode and they can listen to it and figure out what to get your kids. But yeah, it's definitely a team effort to get the right gift for your kids and you, you have to have grace for people who are going to give your kids the wrong things. It's okay. They're, they're doing their best and they're trying, but  we hope you guys.  Picked up some good ideas for Christmas,.

And we have two things we want to talk about, first off, we're going to take a break from Raising Disabled, just through the holiday season. Life is crazy during the holidays, as you all know. And so, we are going to just take a little break. We're going to come back on January 19th and just catch up with you guys about how the holidays were, how traveling with your disabled kids and all the massive family gatherings and just all the things. So we're excited to get back and talk about that. So we'll be taking a little break and you'll still be able to hear from us on social media and stuff, but we are just taking a little break. Just to be with our families. 

Rhandyl:

Yes, we hope you guys have a wonderful Christmas and New Year and we talked a lot about gifts, obviously that's what the subject was today. And so something really neat that Deonna and Allie and her son Cole have been doing for the last few years is this awesome project called Stuff the Van with Allie and Cole- where they literally stuffed their van full of these awesome toys that are donated. And all the proceeds and all the donations go to  one of our local hospitals here in Lubbock. And so, yeah, Deonna just kind of tell us a little more about that and how our listeners can help out and where they can find  the link and how to donate? 

Deonna:

So we started this because when we were in the hospital in 2020, we, like we could get presents for Allie and everything, but the hospital was doing so many fun things that just made it suck a little less.

And these people called Child Life Specialists, which we spoke with a Child Life Specialist a few episodes ago, but they basically try to make the hospital as pleasant as it can be and make it a good experiences as much as they can. And so what we do is we had child life doing all these amazing things for us back in the day. And being in the hospital and the holidays is hard because it just feels like the whole world is going on without you. And it's, it's a tough. It is. It's a really hard time and you're kind of jealous of everybody on the outside. Yeah, for sure. That's how it felt for me. 

But anyways, when we got here, we decided we, we did this, this is our third year and so all we do is on Instagram, I'm @deonnawadeart and you can look up my handle by going to Raising Disabled Podcast on Instagram. And basically I have a link on there and you click on the Amazon link, you pick out one or two or ten items or toys and this is a list that we've chosen. With me, my son, my daughter, and then child life specialists at the hospital. So, it's not random. The hospital wants these specific things for kids and teens. And so, yeah, you just click on the link and you pick out a few things and then when you check out, you choose my name and address instead of yours. And it'll, it'll show up when you're checking out. And then we get the toys, and we.. They get shipped to my house and then we go deliver them in December. So yeah, it's really fun. It's fun to see what people buy. And that also is a really great list for gift ideas as well, because there's, there's, it's our biggest list ever and it's a good one, so, it's really fun, we have a good time doing it. Our house looks like Santa's workshop, and I love it, our Amazon driver thinks I have a massive shopping addiction, so, it's a fun time, so. He got out today and I was like, we're doing a toy drive, so it's going to be a thing for a while. And he's like, okay, I was kind of wondering, like, what is going on? 

Rhandyl:

He just needs his own route to your house. 

Deonna:

I know, I mean, I would say regular people aren't getting 20 to 25 boxes from Amazon every day for a month and a half, but maybe they are. I don't know.  We all love Amazon so. No judgment. Yeah. Yeah, I know, right?

But yeah, if y'all want to participate in that, you can and honestly, if you want to copy me and do the exact same thing for your local hospital, wherever you're at, they would take it. So it's yeah, it's a fun thing. And I hope we get to copied a lot of times.

Rhandyl:

I know. I love it. I'm so glad that you guys do that. And hopefully we can help you guys out this year, so..

Deonna:

Yeah, she, Rhandyl volunteered to take stuff down there with me and I'm like, are you sure you want to get involved in this? Oh yeah. But, but luckily they bring these big bins down and we just throw it all in there and they take it up and deal with it. So, I'm done at that point. 

So that's it for today and we hope you guys have a really amazing holiday season and you guys have so much fun. And if you guys take any pictures of your kids using any of these items please share it with us because that would just make us so happy and we'll see you on January 19th. 

**Disclaimer

Deonna:

Before we go, I wanna remind our listeners that this podcast is for the purpose of education and entertainment only, and is not a replacement for seeing a doctor. We suggest you seek out the help of a trained professional for help with your child's specific situation.