Struggling with imposter syndrome? Oof the struggle is real, especially for women in business. In this episode, I'll share 3 unconventional affirmations that have helped me at various stages in my business.
From the early days when I thought I had no business being there... To the starter years when I was finding my way... To my most recent affirmations and how I use them to keep my goals in sight.
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Do you ever have to talk yourself up or talk yourself into something like you can do this, Kate, we got this. Do you have a little voice in your head? That is your very own hype person. That's sort of the function of affirmations and how I use affirmations. The first step is clocking where you need the affirmation.
The second step is writing it and the third step is actually utilizing it. And so I want to tell you three, rather obscure times that. affirmations have changed my entire business and changed my outlook on my entire life. Just by repeating these words to myself until they become truths.
When I was first starting my business, I think like a lot of people, I felt like a total imposter now. The term imposter syndrome didn't exist to me yet, because for most people we're not like self identifying as imposters were just self identifying as dumdums who can't get the job done and who have no business being here.
Right. That's the kind of language we're saying to ourselves. We're like, oh my gosh, everyone else is better than me. Everyone else is further ahead than me. I don't even have the right to charge what I'm charging. That is what imposter syndrome, as it were, feels like. So when I was at that point in my life, a friend of mine said to me, Jenna, you were the most capable person.
I know. And it like, literally, almost I still want to cry because I don't think she realized how powerful those words were when she said them to me to be considered a capable woman. I had not considered myself a capable woman. I did not think anyone looked at me and thought I was a capable woman. I was an actor.
I was a bartender. I was young. I was in my twenties. I was just trying to hack it, you know? So that was like the biggest compliment I had ever gotten. So to remind myself of it, I wrote it on a piece of paper. I ripped that piece of paper out of a notebook and taped it to the wall by my bed in my one room apartment.
No, not one bedroom, one room. It was just one room with a galley kitchen. Love that apartment in Toronto. Anyway, so here I have on the wall, I am capable. It was my new affirmation. I am capable. Say Agena. Believe it own it. But the story doesn't end there. Because I have really wonderful. Supportive friends.
And I didn't often have people over due to the house being one room. I met a friend of mine came over and she saw that on the wall, which can sometimes be embarrassing when you have like a. Dream board up on the wall or an affirmation or a motivational poster. Anyway, she saw that and she like guffawed and she grabbed a marker and added in. I am more than capable. Which really meant. A lot to me that that was how she saw me.
She was like capable. Understatement. Got to a few weeks or months later, I still have this up on the wall with the added encouragement of my friend who had written more than I had another girlfriend over. And she grabbed, honestly, I think a lipstick and she edited once more. So it said I am more than fucking capable.
I'm like honestly crying the faith that my friends had in me. And how inspiring it is and how important it is to have friends like that. So I still have a photo of this piece of paper up on the wall, in my one room raccoon infested apartment. I am more than fucking capable. That affirmation; I think it really changed my life.
But they don't all have big, broad sentimental stories like that. For a while in my business, I was still really learning where to meet boundaries with customer service.
I'd had some client interactions that I wasn't proud of that hadn't gone smoothly. And I started fearing my clients. Um, you know, as soon as you have a few, like, Spicy conversations. I started getting scared to jump on calls with clients, and I was afraid that people were mad at me all the time. I was always afraid that my clients were mad.
I don't know if I thought of this or a business coach or someone told me to do it, but I put on my, you know, those little felt boards where you put in all the letters and it kind of looks like maybe a menu at a coffee shop and you pop the letters in. So I spelled out on my felt bored. All my clients love me and I put it somewhere where I could see it all the time.
So all my clients love me. All my clients love me. Just try and remember that. Like assume they have positive regard for me when I go into these calls and my. Husband now, boyfriend at the time. Took it upon himself to pull out some more letters and change it to all my clients. Love my butt. Which was honestly really funny. Essentially when people came over to our, of Arvin and saw this, all my clients love my button.
I had to like, explain the story. But it also helped to sort of lighten the mood and then eventually I didn't need that anymore. And I could take the letters out. That's the same felt board that I wrote a hundred K on.
And I do believe that year was the first time I hit a hundred K or I was like 98,000. I was like really close to it.
So I'm really big on having these words around us to remind our brain what we're going for. And here's another one that came out of me having, again, making mistakes in my business and having problems and having imperfect relationships with people and having like a client or to get mad at me or perceiving that they were mad at me or whatever. I started being scared to look at my inbox and I started being scared to look at slack. Uh, so I don't know if you've experienced this.
I don't hope you have, but I also hope that I'm not alone. Like, it can't be just me. Right. But when you start getting negative emails from someone and then you just start being scared every time you see the little alert, pop up. On your emails to say you have a new message. And so I had to remind myself, it's probably good news.
Now, when I see the sign pop up, that I have new email or a new slack message, I try and say as much as possible in my head. It's probably good news because the stress of. Worrying that it might be bad news or someone that's unhappy with me. Is oftentimes, probably worse than someone actually being unhappy.
So I remind myself when a new message comes in. It's probably good news and I'm toying with a new one. I'll let you know how it goes. My new one is I get opportunities in my inbox and I have evidence of that. You know, I have got opportunities in my inbox, but I want to try and draw more to me and be aware when they come and thankful for them.
So my new affirmation is I have opportunities in my inbox. I would love to hear your affirmations, 📍 whether you're listening on Spotify right now, and you want to tell me your affirmation as a comment on this episode, or you want to reach out to me on Instagram at Jenna's page and tell me your affirmations or affirmations that changed your life.
I would love to hear about them and that's all from me. I'll see you in the next one.