Unlock the Best Version of Yourself: Nico Lagan's Journey from Addiction to Advocacy

What if a single phone call could change your life forever?

Join us as we explore the transformative journey of Nico Lagan, who transitioned from a life of addiction and crime to becoming a mentor and advocate. 

A single phone call from his mother was the turning point that led him to overcome substance abuse, embrace martial arts, and cultivate discipline and inner strength.

We also share our life-changing journey, which began during the pandemic. It involved leaving the corporate world for a secluded retreat. Guided by a mentor, we delved into the five virtues of a good man: courage, protection, provision, temperance, and faith. These principles have greatly influenced our journey, emphasizing the importance of active listening and daily reflection.

Martial arts is a key theme, providing life lessons beyond physical defense. Exercising restraint during confrontations and balancing masculine and feminine traits offer insightful personal growth and self-control lessons.

This episode is a compelling guide to inner strength and transformation, whether you're facing professional hurdles or pursuing personal development.

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Transcript

Dai Manuel: 0:07

Have you ever wondered how a man transforms his life from the depths of addiction to becoming a beacon of inspiration and strength? In today's riveting episode of the 2% Solution Podcast, I have the privilege of chatting with Nico Lagan, a man whose journey is as powerful as it is transformative. Nico is not just any guest. He faced rock bottom and clawed his way back up to becoming a mentor, a speaker and an advocate for personal transformation. From overcoming addiction to mastering martial arts and empowering men to embrace their best selves. Nico's story is one you won't want to miss. So buckle up, because we're diving into the virtues of a good man, the power of discipline and how to harness your inner strength to create a life worth living. Stay tuned, because this episode will inspire you to make those 2% changes that lead to extraordinary results, changes that lead to extraordinary results.

Dai Manuel: 1:06

Love the intro because, jeez man, you are so darn dynamic, and when we first met it was at the Phoenix conference, where we were both speakers. I also had the opportunity to be interviewed by you for your socials, and I know it was what was starting out as a very new journey for you, but, my goodness, in the last 12 months it has literally just been a catapult to the stratosphere for you as far as reach, but also in controversy, and what I mean by that. We'll get into that. But I know that you're someone that does not shy away from people that have differing opinions and you are very quick to have a very engaging conversation, going sometimes very passionate and passion, but with great thought and great experience comes those perspectives and beliefs. So that's what I want to come out today is really, let's just talk about it.

Dai Manuel: 1:54

So I'm going to let's start it off with this, nico, you know, I know there was a pivotal moment for you. That's going to set us up with why you're doing what you're doing today. But what was the pivotal moment that set you on the path of your personal transformation? Because, my goodness, talking about where you were, but also where you are now, but, more important, dude, where you're going next, because that's where I'm most inspired. So take it away. I'd love to hear it.

Nico Lagan: 2:18

When I was 14 years old, when my dad left. This is where it all started. They went downhill from there. You know, boys need inspiration, they need a man to mold themselves after and remove that man, they'll start looking for a replacement. But what did I know at 14 years old, right? What did I know? What a good man was? What was I supposed to look at? Well, I looked at drug dealers. I looked at rappers. I looked at guys that didn't look at rappers. I looked at guys that didn't necessarily treat women the right way. I looked at really bad influences. But what did I know? So this is the path I went on, and I was on that path. You know I was. I dropped out of school within a year.

Nico Lagan: 2:58

I was a drug addict. I was a drug dealer in order to pay for my addiction. I was not a good man, like let's call a spade a my addiction. I was not a good man. Let's call a spade a spade. I was not a good person. I was a thief. I was a thug. I did not do a lot of good around me.

Nico Lagan: 3:13

I was extremely selfish, and that lasted for years, until my early twenties, and a simple phone call from my mother kind of changed everything, because I left my mother's house. I was 17 years old, so by then I'd been living by myself for at least four years and you know I was at a crossroad. I had an opportunity where I could, instead of selling drugs, I could start producing it, and I received a phone call from my mother asking me if I was happy. You know sometimes when you're, when you're ready to listen, when you you've hit rock bottom. Cause, imagine this I'm sitting on the floor of my apartment, my every, all of my stuff's in boxes.

Nico Lagan: 3:54

I'm getting evicted for the third time in four apartments, so literally four years. Third time Cause, you know, all I did is party and I was not a respectful neighbor, so nobody wanted me in their apartment. I was not a good person again. So I'm sitting there with all my stuff in boxes. I'm not sure where I'm going from. Here I have an opportunity to do something different or something. It's like a promotion in my world, right, selling drugs to producing it.

Dai Manuel: 4:22

It's a massive promotion.

Nico Lagan: 4:24

But I had that opportunity but it wasn't right now. I still needed more time and I'm sitting there getting evicted, nowhere to go. I'm becoming homeless and I'm like, what do I do now? And I get a phone call Like I don't believe. This is the day I stopped believing in coincidences.

Nico Lagan: 4:38

God spoke to me through my mother and it was a simple question Are you happy? And you know, until then I never really looked at that question. I never looked at answering that question. But I firmly believe that if you are in a situation where you don't know what the next step is, you're hitting rock bottom and you simply don't know. You're simply hurting. You don't know what the solution is, but you know you're not happy. But somebody asks you a very simple question and I didn't have an answer for her. And you know that simple question put me on a completely different path.

Nico Lagan: 5:16

That same night I took a decision to leave everything behind. That simple question made me move back to my mother's place, made me stop drinking, stop doing drugs, made me stop all of my friends. I started going to recovery meetings like NAA. Within two and a half years or so I had my high school diploma and I had finished a fast track college education like a technical college. I had discovered the gym and I was starting martial art Like. Within the span of about two and a half years, I went from being a drug addict to being a college graduate that was learning all about fitness. That was for the first time in his life, realizing that he was intelligent, that he had discipline, that he was capable of hard work that he was capable of being a good person and giving back to the people around him.

Nico Lagan: 6:12

So does that answer your question?

Dai Manuel: 6:14

I think that well, as far as the origin story is concerned, and then that pivotal shift, and that you got to commend your mom for asking the question and holding space for you, but also you for taking the step right. I mean, it takes a lot of courage to. Also a lot of people would look moving back home as a step back. Me. I see it as a step up, you know, because here we are, you're going back, you're recognizing you need to do foundation safety, but also someone that you're getting unconditional support from no matter what Right, and that's the nice thing about parents. You're getting unconditional support from no matter what Right and that's the nice thing about parents. At least not not everyone's parent, but but at least your mom was insightful enough to ask you the tough question and I imagine that came from a place of love.

Nico Lagan: 6:56

you know, and you know that go after that, though you know, I think you need to take a step back in order to there's there's often in your life you'll have to take a step back in order to step's there's often in your life you'll have to take a step back in order to step forward because, like this is something I've done many, many times and I'll continue.

Nico Lagan: 7:10

I tried something that didn't work out and I'm just like, okay, hold on, let's stop this, let's step backwards and see where it stopped working and that's okay, that's a, that's a learning thing. It's not absolutely.

Nico Lagan: 7:20

It's never wasted time unless you've learned something you know, einstein describes it as insanity trying the same thing over and over again, expecting different results. If you're in that situation, it's probably time you stop, step back and try to figure out what's going wrong. But unless that's the case it's not, it's not. You're not wasted time, you've learned something, and life is all about experiences. At the end of the day life. The good comes with the bad, because how would you know that something's good if you've never experienced bad?

Dai Manuel: 7:53

yes, you're right, we learn through contrasts, right, yeah, life is always like that the best.

Nico Lagan: 7:59

You know. The best lessons I've ever had were through pain and suffering. You don't learn when everything's going well. You learn where your life sucks and you're hurting so bad that you're just oh man, what am I supposed to do now? This is where you ponder and you look at yourself in the mirror and say you know what, bro, my life sucks and guess what? It's my fault.

Nico Lagan: 8:23

Then what can I do from here? Because if you have the chance to destroy your life, guess what it's my fault. Then what can I do? What can I do from here? Because if you have the chance to destroy your life, guess what. You also have the power to make it good, to make it better, because, at the end of the day, happiness is not a destination, it's a state of mind.

Nico Lagan: 8:34

You can decide to be happy right now. I know people I've met people through my backpacking experiences that had nothing and yet most hospitable person you'll ever meet. They'll share their last meal with you and they're just happy to be alive. So lovely, I love it. It's all about accountability, right?

Dai Manuel: 8:56

Yeah, well, actually, let's, let's speak to that, because then you've said on this journey, you know, after you got the high school education sorry, not only in the high school you got there, your ged but then you finished, uh, college, got into health and well-being, got into martial arts in a big way, but also professionally, really leaned into a career that had a lot to do with connecting with people, having tough conversations, but also helping people make best decisions given their situation. You know you were working in sales and doing extremely well one of the top 1% of the 1% earners when it comes to big ticket sales and you know it was through that experience, however, you've come up with the five virtues of a good man. So, if you can speak to that transition, you know, like, all of a sudden, you know a lot of people would think, okay, you went from rock bottom. Now you've made it and then you turned your back on that and did it all over again. It's lovely.

Dai Manuel: 9:53

I relate to that because I did the same thing at 30. You know I left a very stable career, a stable company I co-founded, to pursue something else, and so I relate to this very much. So, if you can just share a bit of that. I think that would be wonderful for the listeners.

Nico Lagan: 10:05

You know, march 2020 is when I was faced with that.

Nico Lagan: 10:10

We all know what happened back then, and I was faced with that situation, I'm like for the first time I didn't have to be in a city Because all my customers were. I was doing sales, so I was face-to-face every day, I was in my clients' places and we were talking business and for the first time in 12 years I did not have to be somewhere. I literally could work from anywhere in the world. So I basically left the city, got rid of my place in the city, moved to my investment house in the middle of nowhere, log house top of a mountain, in the middle of the forest, which I spent three years of my life there. And this is where I took the time to look in the mirror and say you know what, what's next? And I, I figured it out, took me about two years to put the plan together and now, 14 months ago, I've been. I quit my corporate job. I left my job as a sales engineer. I've become a man. What am I? Become An eternal teenager?

Nico Lagan: 11:11

I guess I just try. You know, I left with an idea of what I've wanted but not how to do it. I bought myself the past 14 months to figure it out. I really wanted to move the nine to five. I knew that I was good at creating content. I had up to then I had produced probably 200 podcasts. I've had spoken to a lot of people that are world known and I'm like you know what.

Nico Lagan: 11:37

I have so many transferable skills from sales to this and now we've traveled through 23 states, plus Mexico, past 14 months, and you know it's a guy to answer your question. It's a guy in Austin, texas, at the gym that challenged me. He's a very well-known influencer. He found me at the gym, we started talking and he's like hey, bro, we need to record some content. I want you to tell me what are the five things you'd say to a young man. And I went back home and I sat down. I'm like, man, that's a great question. I spent most of, I spent basically all night up and I came up with the five virtues of a good man. So, alan, somebody challenged me. What are the five things you'd say to a man? I'm like okay, cool and courage, being a protector, being a provider, having temperance and having faith. That's what I came up with.

Nico Lagan: 12:32

For the past year. That's all I talk about all the time. I'm writing my second book right now and it's going to be on the five virtues of a good man.

Dai Manuel: 12:42

So empowering. I love this, but I also love the clarity of focus, but how something can be just. It's sort of that planted seed. Right, they asked you that question but because of all the prep work and all the changes you yourself have been embarking on, it's like the right time, right place, right question and all of a sudden, not only an idea and a philosophy is born, but way of life, which is what you've been living the last 14 months, which is also extremely impressive.

Nico Lagan: 13:12

And listening. You know listening Because everybody has those opportunities. I'm no different than all the other billions of people out there.

Dai Manuel: 13:21

We just don't see it, Because one thing to have the opportunity is another one to take the opportunity out there. We just don't see it Because one thing to have the opportunity is another one to take the opportunity, but not only that but you know, 21 years ago, when I decided to change, I was listening.

Nico Lagan: 13:31

I look at the opportunity and I waited. I removed my emotions from it and I just said okay, this is where I'm at. This is what the opportunity is. This is the crossroad. I could do this or I could do that. Which one makes more sense? Okay, I went that way. This is where it started.

Nico Lagan: 13:50

Now, every day, I reflect. Every single day, I reflect. I'm like okay, this happened to me today. What does it mean? I try to understand.

Nico Lagan: 13:59

I try to find meaning in every single people that I meet. I try to find meaning in every single action that I meet. I try to find meaning in the whole action that I take. I'm trying to find meaning in every single interaction that I have. Like, every time I meet someone, I'm like okay, am I supposed to learn something from those people? Am I supposed to teach them something? Are they going to be with me for a long time, or is it just that one time? Like, I literally take the time to be aware, because this is where everything changed, because people don't listen. We're so egotistical that we don't care. We think that people challenging us is an attack.

Nico Lagan: 14:36

You know how one of my best friends slash mentor. He calls my bull all the time, like, hey, what are you doing, bro, what the hell are you doing? And he doesn't say it in a way to hurt my feet well, even if he did, he couldn't care less. But he doesn't say it in a way to try to insult me, but he's just like out of love. He's like what are you doing? This is how, this is how I. I just choose to see my life is everybody I deal with. I try to see where I fit in their life and what they fit in mine.

Dai Manuel: 15:07

And what's the grand?

Nico Lagan: 15:09

like what's the? In the grand scheme of things, where are, where do we fit into each other's life and life and I think that's where it starts is just to be accountable for your actions and be aware of what happens in your life, cause we have opportunities all the time because it's a choice. Again, just like happiness is not a destination, opportunities are a choice. They're everywhere. You just choose to listen or not. That's up to you.

Dai Manuel: 15:37

Well, I think that's insightful and you know this, this five virtues of a good man. I like to sort of just speak to one thing, cause there's also something I know that's very much part of that story. In your early twenties, you talk about Jen, you talk about this getting in touch with your physicality, your strength, your inner and outer strength, and and then martial arts, just the philosophy that comes with being a protector, you know. So I love to explore that concept of what does it mean to be a protector and a provider? But, more importantly, how does fitness play?

Dai Manuel: 16:07

you as it relates to your experience. Well, great, yeah, so expand on that, because I don't need to. We won't talk about all five virtues. So that's the reason why people are going to want to put profile out there in my communities, my audiences, that that struggle with the health piece, the fitness piece, their physicality piece and the confidence based on the lack thereof you know. So please just dive into that for a minute and talk about your story as well, of how you came to that.

Nico Lagan: 16:36

But it's all starts there. This is what I've learned, looking back. My whole process changed when I took over my body. It is the. It is about the only thing in life now that you can't buy. To this day, we still can't buy it. You know one of my buddy, the same guy that asked me about the five, about the five tips. He was on a podcast with uh Bradley and he asked the guy, asked him. He's like's like hey, do you have abs? He's like 24 years old. He's absolutely jacked. Of course he does. So he takes his shirt off and he's like yeah, here, there we go. He's like did do you realize that one out of 10 americans is a millionaire, but only less than one percent have visible abs?

Nico Lagan: 17:22

so less than kind of a mirror. It's more than 10 times harder to have visible abs than to be a millionaire, yet everybody out there has the possibility of taking their body to the next level. This is something that you control. Not only do you control it, but it's physical. It's something you can see every day. And look in the mirror. Take your clothes off, look at yourself in the mirror. Are you happy what you see? No, your fault. But at the same time, if you start dedicating time to developing your body, to start treating it with the respect that it deserves and not like a dumpster if, can you imagine if people took care of their bodies the same way they take care of their cars?

Nico Lagan: 18:02

Their smartphones Like yeah, that's a good point, like seriously people care more about their phones.

Dai Manuel: 18:10

Like it's, it's wild I see it all the time. It's just it's.

Nico Lagan: 18:14

It's incredible really I never thought about it this way. I'll always use the car the car explanation but I'm stealing this. I'm telling you right now I'm taking. But you know the day I was a very scrawny kid and when I first discovered the gym and I started to see that I was able to modify something, I was literally able to envision something in my head and say I would like to look like this guy. I'd see a movie. I see those same movies 20 years later. I'm like man. Even that guy I idolized was a twig Like he's a twig. But you know, back then I was 145 pounds on about six foot two. So I'm looking at those guys hey, I'm like 215 right now, 215, 220.

Nico Lagan: 18:56

So it's been a long journey, but the day I realized that I'm capable of molding my body using my imagination, I can see, I can picture something in my mind and say this is what I want. All I need to do is to go to the gym. All I need to do is to be more careful about what I eat, to put the right fuel in my body in order to produce the results that I want. And the reason hitting the gym is so important is because it will eventually give you access to your mind. They say that you need 21 days to form a new habit. Force yourself for two, three months. 21 days is not long enough, but force yourself for two to three months to do it, and if you can't do it alone, hire somebody to keep you accountable. If you can't do it alone, there's no shame in having a coach that will keep you accountable and all he's going to do is to motivate you and I'm doing this in our brackets because I absolutely hate the word motivation, but discipline is built through accountability.

Nico Lagan: 20:02

If you can't hold yourself accountable, hire somebody. Same thing with your diet If you can't keep up to it, have somebody design a plan for you. Hire somebody at a gym. You know you either make time for your fitness or you make time for your sickness. It's up to you. It's up to the one that you want. But the day I realized this, I gained power over my mind because I realized, hey, I have discipline, yeah, and discipline is everything.

Nico Lagan: 20:29

And this migrated to martial art because I was bullied when I was younger and I was a victim. I was a. I was a coward. I did not know what to do. I let myself get beat up and I just had graduated college. I've been hitting the gym for a couple of years, so I have discipline. I realized that you know what, if I don't like the way I look, I can change it. But now what's interesting is when you start challenging your ideas all the time. You never stop. Once you start challenging, you start looking at every single aspect of your life and you're like could that be better? Could that be better? Could that be better responsibility for my fitness? I realized that if I did not want to be a victim anymore, if I did not want to be a coward anymore, I needed to learn to defend myself, because those are my options.

Nico Lagan: 21:19

Be a victim and know in the deep, in the back of your head, that you do not possess the skill to defend yourself, to defend your future family or do something about it.

Nico Lagan: 21:29

And this is when I stepped in my first martial art gym, and that was men Yeesh 20, almost 20 years ago, 18 years ago. Wow, and it's. This is what's interesting, if fitness gives you access to your mind martial art, because when you look at fitness when you're hitting the gym, it's very selfish. You're alone, like most of the time, it's for you, you do it for your health, but when you start surrounding yourself by animals because go to a martial arts gym I can understand why people are intimidated. You're literally surrounded by killers. That likes to hit each other in a padded room Right, that, that's exactly how I see it. And but then, when you start going there, you start realizing that those guys are some of the nicest guys that you you'll ever meet, because they're not scared, because they know as as the skill to defend themselves, they possess the skill of de-escalation, they possess the skill of discipline, they possess the skill of depending on acalation, they possess the skill of discipline, they possess the skill of depending on a team, because that's one thing martial art taught me is to be dependable, but to also depend on others, and, as a guy that grew up without a father figure.

Nico Lagan: 22:47

That's where I found my first real mentors were the people that coached, the head coaches of those schools. Because look at a great coach and in sports it happens all the time you get a great coach. What he does is he takes a shared passion, like, let's say, football, starts teaching boys football At least that's what it looks like, but what he's actually doing is passing on life lessons through his football teachings. He, he's using football to teach you about life. Coach Carter, one of my favorite movies ever made this is what he did through basketball. I've met a hundred guys like that through martial art and I can tell you, if it wasn't for this, I wouldn't have been. If it wasn't for the fact that I met those guys, that they invested time in me, that I started fighting as an amateur, that I would have never been able to translate this into cells.

Nico Lagan: 23:50

In front of thousands of people I've lost in front of thousands of people. Do you think I was intimidated to put a suit and to go give a presentation to people I already trained to get in a fight, to get in a ring and people where I could get beat up. You know Fight Club. The movie explains that when men start fighting the rest of their life's volume just get tuned down, because what's one of the worst things that can happen to somebody is to get in a fight where they need to fight for their life. When you understand that you possess the skill to do it, you start looking at everything else. You're like, ooh, I have to do a presentation on something. It's not that scary anymore, right?

Dai Manuel: 24:33

But the restraint piece is also critical, and I know you have a story that you shared with me once about a little parking lot incident. Can you talk about that story? Because I think this is a great example of sure, you know your power, you know your ability, but it's not a matter of just flaunting it or I mean it's temperament right, it's also that ability to be disciplined and to recognize when to fight and when not to fight, you know.

Dai Manuel: 25:01

and so if you can speak to that, because I think you know, I don't want everybody thinking oh geez, nico's just this big thug you know, like dogs to great game, right, yep, if you don't believe or agree with them, and that's not the case, it's a purchase from a church. So, and I think that story really captures that, if you don't mind sharing it, you got a good memory, well. I do I remember that story man?

Nico Lagan: 25:22

I forgot. I didn't forget that story, but I forgot. I told you it's a few years back, years back. We're literally walking in. I think it was our second meeting with one of the biggest customers I've ever signed. We were talking five to 10 mil the original contract, that's what it was worth.

Nico Lagan: 25:37

And so I'm in a suit, I'm looking for a parking lot. It's a big parking lot, it's a big company and you can always recognize when people are not paying attention. So this guy was dropping off people on the side of the parking lot so that they could go to work. And I know he's not paying attention. So I'm keeping my eye on him. He's on the right side, I'm passing him on the left and he almost hits me. But just before he does, I just beep, just a bit like nothing. I'm like man. I literally just tapped it so that he sees me and the guy just goes ballistic, like he gets out of his car, gives me the fingers, starts calling me names, starts screaming at me. This does not intimidate me. I know exactly the type of person that you are.

Nico Lagan: 26:18

So I found a parking space, parked my car, I got out of the car and I went to see him. I'm not going to turn my back on a guy that that's irate, like that I don't. If there's one thing you know don't be stupid, because if you're not paying attention, that can really hurt you. So I just went to the guy and it's a big boy Like I'm still about six to I'm probably about 200 back then, probably six, four to 60 to 50 is a big guy and he's just in my face with Bob Bob, bob, bob, bob, and he's just screaming and screaming, and screaming, and screaming, and screaming.

Nico Lagan: 26:48

I didn't do anything, I just stood there and I looked at him and I'm like okay, bye, because at the end of the day there's nothing. I had two choices I could attack him or I could pay attention. Let him vent and pay attention to what he's doing. I knew what his hands were. I was looking at his feet, I was looking at his head. I'm paying attention to his demeanor. He did not want to fight. He did not want to fight, he just wanted to be heard.

Nico Lagan: 27:15

So that happens a lot with big guys. Right, they're so used to scaring people that when they meet somebody that's not scared of them, they're like hey, what's going on? And their ego gets hurt.

Dai Manuel: 27:27

So I, I let it scream, and I just left, ego gets hurt.

Nico Lagan: 27:29

So I I let it scream and I just left and turns out that my colleague was right at the was literally a hundred feet from me. So he saw everything and he's just, he knows what I, he knows what I was doing. Like back then I was, I wasn't fighting anymore, but I was still coaching and I was coaching champions, right? So my colleague is just what just happened. How could you stay so calm? And in my head I'm like what are my options? Like seriously, what are my options? I'm going to knock somebody out in my customer's parking lot. Are you kidding me? Everything that I've done for the past since I've been 20, I'm going to risk it all to go to jail. For what? For?

Dai Manuel: 28:11

him.

Nico Lagan: 28:12

No, absolutely not. And it turns out that I did extremely well, Cause, as we went in, the customer himself was looking at me. He's like hey, what happened there? Can you tell me what happened? He wanted? He wanted to know who that guy was.

Nico Lagan: 28:27

I'm like I don't know, if I did, I wouldn't have told him like I'm not there to snitch on the guy. But the point is that control is everywhere, like that's why temperance is one of the five virtues of a good man, because, yes, you must be a protector as a man, you need to know the skills to defend yourself, to defend your family, but you need to be able to show restraint. You need to be able to know when it's applicable and when to use the escalation. And this is all I did for that guy. I just stood there. There's nothing I could have said that would have made him less irate, but me doing nothing. You know, sometimes that's the what. One of the hardest thing you can do is do nothing.

Dai Manuel: 29:09

It's a pattern interrupt Big time Yep, and you know what he was expecting you to get all in his face right, like that's what he was wanting. He wanted confrontation, and you used to get a lot of that.

Nico Lagan: 29:21

It's so great and it's interesting because I wonder if he ever realized that if he did something I would have hurt him bad, because back then I got to say that I wasn't as tempered as much as I was tempered this back then. I still believe that if you had the audacity to touch me, I would leave a mark on you that you'd remember the rest of your life. And I love elbows. I'm a Muay Thai guy.

Nico Lagan: 29:49

I love elbows, and elbows leave very nice scars in your face. But I wonder if guys like that do realize how close they came, who they were dealing with. Cause, don't take my my patience for weakness. On the contrary, it takes everything to this day. This could happen to me today and in my head I'm going crazy.

Dai Manuel: 30:10

I'm just like. I'm just like.

Nico Lagan: 30:12

I'm telling myself relax, relax, it's not worth it. Like, don't do anything. So you know it's. That's one thing I got to say for the people listening. It's not because somebody looks calm that they actually are.

Nico Lagan: 30:26

It's not because somebody looks like they're composed that they actually are. They just learned to hide it. I haven't achieved I'm not a Buddhist monk. I haven't achieved that level where nothing bothers me Like anybody out there. It bothers me. I just know what I can and cannot do. I can control my reactions. Yes, because how many mistakes are made? How many people are in prison today Because they did not, because they reacted in this situation, because they were the first one to throw that punch, just because they got aggressive?

Nico Lagan: 31:03

And technically, the way he approached me, I could have sold this as self-defense, but what? But what's to say that I hid like a fright train, like my right hand is a powerful one. If I catch you, you're sleeping and what could have happened? How many stories have I heard of personal guy that I know that worked in bars, that got into fight, where they got hurt so bad? Is it really worth it? As good as you are, you never know who you're dealing with, and that goes for. Yet all I had to do is to do nothing and walk away. That right there disabled the whole situation and I can guarantee you that one of the reasons we won that contract is because of that interaction. Just, the guy was so impressed by my reaction that right away you're scoring massive points. So, no matter how I look at it today, this was one of my best reaction to any situation.

Dai Manuel: 32:02

This is probably top three smartest thing I've ever done these five, let's be frank uh, ways of life, or ways of being a good man, and and I, I love that. You are just a great example of that and you know, I know we're getting on the time right now, but I there's a couple questions that really want us to try to get in before we say goodbye. Plus, I want to give you a second to sort of have the last words and share where people can connect with you. Um, I know that you speak to this idea of instant five tenants, right, like this, and and there's a close, uh, you know, and I know I just like wow, because I can tell you now I've not been so stoic in many situations, okay, and and so can you speak to this instinct and faith, but also this idea of rationalize that logically later.

Nico Lagan: 33:30

Man? This is an interesting question because temperance as much as I have some temperance, it is a challenge I will deal with for the rest of my life. Faith like I'm a Christian, I have a hundred percent faith in God.

Nico Lagan: 33:46

I have temperance, but it is something I need to work in every single day If there's one thing I know that I work on every single day, and I will do it for the rest of my life, is temperance, and this is knowing myself. Right the day I became aware I'm like okay, what are my problems? What are my deep rooted problems, like what? What is really the type of person that I am? An aggressive person is who I am. You can see it in the way I create content, in a way I talk you can see that I'm in the.

Dai Manuel: 34:16

I'm an intense aggressive person.

Nico Lagan: 34:17

This is who I am. This is. There's nothing I can do about it. If I did, I wouldn't be myself. But you have to be logical about those things. Like as much cause I like the way you said it that we are humans.

Dai Manuel: 34:31

We are emotional by the end.

Nico Lagan: 34:33

We're not humans being emotional. We are emotionally humans Correct and it's up to us to really know the difference.

Nico Lagan: 34:46

It's up to us to realize that we are emotional. Logically, there's no way around it. We are emotional creatures. What are your faults? Temperance is one of mine, as it is a lot of men out there. So, logically, I have to understand what my fault is. And logically and I like faith for this because I have a way of explaining faith is if you know what your fault is or faults are, because God knows I have a lot of them If you know what your faults are, how can you make it better? By having faith in yourself, by believing that you're capable of being better, by logically knowing what the problems are and emotionally admitting to yourself that you're capable of being better, by logically knowing what the problems are and emotionally admitting to yourself that you can be better, that you're not going to be perfect every day, Because think about it Is there a way for you to ever create self-confidence if you don't first believe in yourself that?

Nico Lagan: 35:47

you first believe you're capable of achieving it. And you can't, there's no way around it. So you need to give you of achieving it. And you can't, there's no way around it, so you need to. You know, for all the people out there, if you don't believe in god, that's fine, like believe in nature, believe in your universe, however you want to call it, it doesn't matter. But you must first have faith that you're capable of accomplishing what you put your mind to. This is a you know faith think about you and I, our relationship.

Nico Lagan: 36:10

We've known each other for about what you put your mind to. This is the first. You know faith. Think about you and I, our relationship. We've known each other for about a year now and we talk every now and then Every few months. We tend to have a conversation where we just see what's happening, what's going on, but I knew from the first time we met that there was something I knew from the first time that I had faith in you to be the person I believe you were, and this is how meaningful relationships are based.

Nico Lagan: 36:37

You cannot create a new relationship if you don't first believe that the person is the person they say they are. This is why faith is so important. It's not just a religious thing. It's really have faith in yourself, have faith in others and have faith in something greater than you, that you do have a reason for being here, that you do have purpose, that you were created for a reason.

Dai Manuel: 37:02

Love this and it's so inspiring, but also, at the same time, it's it's it's accessible. You know what I mean. Like it's very accessible. It's not you're talking about something that somebody does not have the ability to start making changes, you know. But they have to have the ability to make changes to begin, and I know that that's a struggle for some people. So this is actually a great segue to sort of as we get to. The closing today is and you know I'm going to have to have you back. The closing today is and you know I'm going to have to have you back, because we barely scratched the surface and I know there's going to be lots of questions coming, especially around uh, just some of your other aspects of your philosophy. So I know people are going to go check out your social and and be far more.

Nico Lagan: 37:41

There's some spiciness over there, okay, and the video I just I just released today. Prior to this, I'm talking about obesity.

Dai Manuel: 37:52

I'm not gentle. I am not gentle on that one. Oh, you heard it here. So if you get over there to that, that you guys will see exactly what we're talking about. And again, Nico's not afraid to stand behind what he states and says.

Nico Lagan: 38:07

Please challenge me, please challenge me. No, no, seriously that. All I ask is two things Challenge my ideas, because every single time I had an evolution where I changed my ideas is because somebody challenged me. If you can't challenge me. If you want to insult me, please be original. I've heard it all before. Be original. At least entertain me if you're going to insult me. That's all I ask.

Dai Manuel: 38:37

Please be entertaining. I like that well, okay. Well, here's the question, then, as we sort of finish up, as you say, there's some men out there that are listening to us today, and women too, right like I just today. A lot of what we've spoken to it's not that it's just a masculine thing, it's also some skills that like, like they always talk about the masculine feminine. I mean, we really, we really have both aspects of it. It's just we tend to feel more comfortable in one space than the other, you know, and we tend to gravitate to one side versus the other. But both the sides are accessible and we do have feminine qualities, us as men too, you know like and how long, you know, how we show up every day is a choice, but it's also to our core and based on a lot of our values that we, we, we protect and guard, you know, vehemently.

Dai Manuel: 39:16

And that's the one thing I really admire and respect about you is you have not deviated at all from your belief system and if you do get challenged and it does open your eyes to a different perspective, you're the first to acknowledge that. But again, I admire because you're inviting conversation and dialogue and healthy debate. Okay, of course you're doing it in a way that it gets people to that uncomfortable place, pretty dark, but that is a place where, you know, unique ideas happen but also big changes, right, like paradigm shifts, like this is big stuff, um and so. For that person that maybe doesn't have that faith or that belief in themselves right now, what would be the simplest thing or the the, the thing that you would invite them to start doing for, you know, minimum, less than 30 minutes a day the next week to 10 days, but if they did that one thing, you know it would start to move the needle forward for them around belief and faith and just that, trusting their instincts. What would be that best first step, you feel?

Nico Lagan: 40:20

Are you happy? Because it is really that simple? Are you because it translates to everything? Are you happy? Okay, you're not Cool. What are you not happy with? Start with the body. Are you happy? Okay, you're not Cool. What are you not happy with? Start with the body. Are you in the best shape you can be? No, hit the gym, don't know how? No problem, hire a personal trainer. How's your diet? Are you treating your cell phone better than you do yourself?

Dai Manuel: 40:45

I'm stealing that one, are you?

Nico Lagan: 40:46

treating your cell phone better than you do yourself. Yes, Then change it. If you're hitting the gym than you do yourself. Yes, then change it. If you're hitting the gym, if you're taking care of yourself. Do you know how to be a protector? No, learn If you are awesome. If you're still not happy, that means you're putting something in your mind that's wrong. Start analyzing what's around you.

Dai Manuel: 41:06

Start analyzing the people that are around you.

Nico Lagan: 41:08

Start analyzing the music you listen to, start analyzing the type of movies you listen to. Who do you surround yourself by? Right then and there, that's 99% of people. 99% of people will fall within what I just described.

Nico Lagan: 41:23

It's just a matter of asking yourself real questions. Are you happy? No, why? And dig deeper, but, as we talked about, start with the body. It all starts there. How can you ever expect to feel good if you don't treat your body with the respect that it deserves, and it's something that we all have the power to do? You know a?

Nico Lagan: 41:49

lot of people out there. Oh, but it's expensive to eat healthy. You know what? I've been intermittent fasting for five or six years now. I eat one or two meals a day. So don't tell me that I save a lot of money by intermittent fasting, but that's not the reason I do it. I started this year with a three days fast just water. But this is a choice. This is good for you. How? But this is a choice. This is good for you. How bad do you want it? So don't tell me that it's a matter of money, because, again, make time for your health or be ready to make time for your sickness. But this is where it starts. Are you happy? No, why Start with your body and then analyze what's around you Right then. And there 99% of people fall there.

Dai Manuel: 42:33

That's around you Right then, and there 99% of people fall there. That's wonderful advice, and I think giving them a list of questions is something that we'll work on, collaborate on, so by the time this episode comes out, there'll be a resource that people can leverage, and I think it is creating that space to not only ask questions, reflect on it, but introspect, really, dig deep to get some clarity, because you're absolutely right, when you start to feel clear, confidence comes At least confidence of what direction you started going at, but also what actions to start taking, and so I appreciate sort of the framework that you shared today. I think this is wonderful and I just wish we had more time, but that just means you got to come back for part two.

Nico Lagan: 43:10

Anytime.

Dai Manuel: 43:11

Nico, let me ask you this You're prolific on social media. Okay, you're prolific. The amount of content that you put out across platforms is remarkable. If someone's looking to just start to be a part of your world, follow along, start to engage with some of your commentary, start to dissect or I was going to say, ingest some of what you're throwing down. Right, and I didn't say it. You know, it might take a little bit of processing, especially depending on the type of person that you are. What would be the best platform that you invite them to start with?

Nico Lagan: 43:43

My favorite is Instagram. It's one of my less popular, but it's the one I like the most. It's, um, it's because of my audience, right, I know my numbers. Like you said, I I'm, I'm big on social media. I know exactly where people are, I know the people that respond and you know I, I normally I'm. I'm not an Andrew Tate. I don't scream at people, I don't my. I don't target 16 year olds either. I target people in their thirties and their forties. No, but it's true, right, if I look at my demographic, I'm somewhere around the 35 to 55.

Dai Manuel: 44:16

This is where 70. That's 90% of the people you're talking to right now, just so you know. But that's my point.

Nico Lagan: 44:21

So but at the same time, like you said earlier, warning to you guys, because I am, you know, I'm somebody that swears, I'm somebody that has a very strong opinion, but I'm extremely fact-based. I read a lot. I read a lot of books, a lot of studies and I've had a very interesting life. So my stuff is not based on emotion, it's based on fact, however you feel about it. But I'm not for everyone, and I'm extremely aware of this. Like I'm not trying to help everyone either, I'm trying to help guys like me that come from a tough background that will respond to a guy that's in shape, that's covered in tattoos. That is, if one thing, that I am, I'm authentic, I this is you've seen me in real life.

Nico Lagan: 45:06

I normally try to tone it down on social media. I'm worse in real life than I am on social media. It's not a knock that I put together, but I mean. Well, at the end of the day, what I do is really out of heart, out of my heart. I'm trying. I really want to help people. You know, my goal is still to help boys become men, men become good men and good men find purpose. This is what I want become good men and good men find purpose. This is what I want.

Dai Manuel: 45:34

This is what I'm dedicated my life to Amazing. Well, I feel very grateful, but also fortunate, to have had you here today. It's been a long time coming. I know we've been chatting about this for a while and I'm excited to finally have been able to get some time one-on-one with you, but also to be able to pick your brain for once. It always seems to be you're on the other end asking me questions. I'm like, well, no, no, no, we're turning the tables today, brother, uh, and and I gotta you know, I gotta say thank you for bringing the wisdom, and I know these come from experiences.

Dai Manuel: 46:09

It's not like you've just made this stuff up, and that's the one thing you shared, especially your background. I know we didn't get into the nitty gritty of it, but I also know that you speak to quite a bit of that, not only your books and your upcoming books, but also your platform. So those that are listening or watching this today, make sure you go to the show notes, connect with Nico. He's got a very engaged platform. That's all I got to tell you. And, uh, there's something for everybody there.

Dai Manuel: 46:34

But before Warren, it's just like when I introduced people to Gary Vaynerchuk. I do the same thing I'm like if you get a little kid in the room, you might want to put some earmuffs on. Okay, that's if you're sensitive to language and other than that, just don't let the profanity close your mind to the actual content that's being shared. That's the only thing I invite you to do. Like if I I mean otherwise I would have never been a fan of Gary Vaynerchuk. You know, 15 years ago, which we started on my own social media journey, you know, like, if I shouldn't handle the language, that New York accent, and him throwing down every other bomb, I would have just closed off and would have never learned, and you know professionally. So thank you for standing up to become men, but also example of what it means to be working to be a better man and, uh, love having you here and to give you last word. Anything you'd like to speak to people today.

Nico Lagan: 47:34

Just thank you. It's you know. Thanks for having me on. It was. It was a blessing meeting you a year ago Almost been a year actually, I know.

Dai Manuel: 47:43

It's remarkable.

Nico Lagan: 47:45

You know what I'm, not that my, my last word is going to be for you. I really appreciate the time We've spoken. Quite a few times in the past we had at least four or five calls where I picked your brain on stuff because you've done some things that I haven't done yet. And thank you to you, man, I appreciate it. Thank you, nico.

Dai Manuel: 48:04

Well, I appreciate you and I can't wait to have you back. Didn't I tell you? Tell you that it was going to be an amazing conversation with Nico today? One thing I hope you take away from today's episode is the power of accountability, discipline and the relentless pursuit of personal growth. Nico shared so many gems from his pivotal moments of transformation to the five virtues of a good man. Those included courage, being a protector, being a provider, temperance and faith. His story is a testament to the fact that, no matter how far you fall, you can always rise higher than ever before.

Dai Manuel: 48:47

Remember to connect with Nico on his various platforms. You can find him on Instagram, youtube and so many more, all the links I've included in the show notes. Engage with this content, challenge your perspectives, but also his, and take that first step toward your transformation. If you found value in today's episode, please subscribe, leave a five-star review and hey, why not? Maybe share it with a friend or a family member that would find value in today's conversation. Your feedback and support mean the world to me and continue to help us bring insightful and inspiring conversation not only to you but to the rest of the 2% Collective community. Until next time, keep making those 2% changes towards a better you, because you're worth it. See you next episode.