Health Bite

181.10 Ways This Doctor Commits To Her Mental Health

May 20, 2024 Dr. Adrienne Youdim
181.10 Ways This Doctor Commits To Her Mental Health
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Health Bite
181.10 Ways This Doctor Commits To Her Mental Health
May 20, 2024
Dr. Adrienne Youdim

Take a moment to prioritize your mental health and well-being.

Dr. Adrienne Youdim is a triple board-certified internist, obesity medicine specialist, and physician nutrition specialist. She is dedicated to helping individuals improve their physical, mental, and emotional well-being through evidence-based practices. 

In this episode, Dr. Adrienne Youdim shares her top ten practices for preserving mental health and well-being. 

These practices are essential for maintaining mental and emotional well-being and can lead to a more fulfilling and balanced life.

What You’ll Learn in this Episode:

  • Replicate Adrienne's top 10 personal well-being practices for her mental health - simple and actionable steps she commits to for her own mental well-being
  • Uncover the secrets to managing expectations and granting yourself permission to prioritize your well-being. 
  • Learn how self-compassion can pave the way for resilience and success in achieving your goals.

"Give yourself permission to live how you want and in a way that is aligned with your physical, mental, and emotional health." - Dr. Adrienne Youdim


Here are Adrienne’s  tips to kickstart your journey for boosting mental and emotional well-being:

  • Tip 1: Give yourself permission to live authentically and prioritize your health.
  • Tip 2: Master the art of managing your thoughts and banish negativity.
  • Tip 3: Control your consumption habits for a healthier mind and body.
  • Tip 4: Discover the power of movement in boosting your mood and energy.
  • Tip 5: Embrace the therapeutic benefits of a writing practice.

The remaining transformative tips (6, 7, 8, 9, 10) are waiting to be unveiled in the full episode. 

Stay tuned to Health Bite for the Week to unlock the complete guide to enhancing your mental and emotional well-being. 

Don't miss out on these life-changing insights!


People,Places, and Resources Mentioned:

Connect with Dr. Adrienne Youdim


3 Ways to Get More From Adrienne

1. Subscribe to our Newsletter. Subscribe Now and get the 5 Bites to Fasttrack your Health and Wellbeing https://dradrienneyoudim.com/newsletter/

2. Buy the Book. The current weightloss strategies have failed you. Its time to address your true hunger. Purchase 'Hungry for More' https://www.amazon.com/Hungry-More-Stories-Science-Inspire/dp/0578875632

3. Leave us a Rating and Review via Apple Podcast. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/health-bite/id1504295718

Show Notes Transcript

Take a moment to prioritize your mental health and well-being.

Dr. Adrienne Youdim is a triple board-certified internist, obesity medicine specialist, and physician nutrition specialist. She is dedicated to helping individuals improve their physical, mental, and emotional well-being through evidence-based practices. 

In this episode, Dr. Adrienne Youdim shares her top ten practices for preserving mental health and well-being. 

These practices are essential for maintaining mental and emotional well-being and can lead to a more fulfilling and balanced life.

What You’ll Learn in this Episode:

  • Replicate Adrienne's top 10 personal well-being practices for her mental health - simple and actionable steps she commits to for her own mental well-being
  • Uncover the secrets to managing expectations and granting yourself permission to prioritize your well-being. 
  • Learn how self-compassion can pave the way for resilience and success in achieving your goals.

"Give yourself permission to live how you want and in a way that is aligned with your physical, mental, and emotional health." - Dr. Adrienne Youdim


Here are Adrienne’s  tips to kickstart your journey for boosting mental and emotional well-being:

  • Tip 1: Give yourself permission to live authentically and prioritize your health.
  • Tip 2: Master the art of managing your thoughts and banish negativity.
  • Tip 3: Control your consumption habits for a healthier mind and body.
  • Tip 4: Discover the power of movement in boosting your mood and energy.
  • Tip 5: Embrace the therapeutic benefits of a writing practice.

The remaining transformative tips (6, 7, 8, 9, 10) are waiting to be unveiled in the full episode. 

Stay tuned to Health Bite for the Week to unlock the complete guide to enhancing your mental and emotional well-being. 

Don't miss out on these life-changing insights!


People,Places, and Resources Mentioned:

Connect with Dr. Adrienne Youdim


3 Ways to Get More From Adrienne

1. Subscribe to our Newsletter. Subscribe Now and get the 5 Bites to Fasttrack your Health and Wellbeing https://dradrienneyoudim.com/newsletter/

2. Buy the Book. The current weightloss strategies have failed you. Its time to address your true hunger. Purchase 'Hungry for More' https://www.amazon.com/Hungry-More-Stories-Science-Inspire/dp/0578875632

3. Leave us a Rating and Review via Apple Podcast. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/health-bite/id1504295718

0:00:02 - (Adrienne Youdim): Hi there, friends. This is a little bit of a different type of recording. I'm coming to you from Rancho La Puerta in Tecate, Mexico. I come here a few times every year to teach participants on mind body skills and mind body medicine. And here I am recording this week's episode of Health Bait for you. And since we are in the midst of mental health awareness monthly, I thought this week I would give you an impromptu, off the cuff podcast talking about the ten things that I do to help preserve my mental health and well being.

0:00:42 - (Adrienne Youdim): Welcome back to Health Bite, the podcast dedicated to providing you tips, guidance and evidence based skills to improve your physical, mental and emotional wellbeing. I'm your host, Doctor Adrian Yudim. I'm a triple board certified internist, obesity medicine and physician nutrition specialist, and I just love sharing the science of living well. My goal is to help you redefine nutrition, to include not only the food that you eat, but all the ways in which we can nourish ourselves physically, mentally and emotionally.

0:01:23 - (Adrienne Youdim): And that's exactly what we're talking about today. So I thought I would share, as I mentioned, the top ten things I do to help preserve my own mental health and well being, and hopefully give you some tips on what you can do on your own as well. And the first thing I thought to share is really giving myself permission. Even being here this week at Rancho La Puerta is something I would have never done three, four, five years ago.

0:02:00 - (Adrienne Youdim): Really so many things that I allow myself today that I never would have allowed myself in the past, which, as I think about it, really is, in a sense giving myself the permission to do these things, permission to work in a different way. As a physician, it's not really conventional to be working out on a ranch in a wellness spa, at least not the way I defined it. My concept of being a physician was being in the office like I often am.

0:02:36 - (Adrienne Youdim): It required permission to do things differently, to do something that gives me quite a bit of joy and that also contributes in a way that I really value. But that is very different than what I have always kind of held in mind. Also permission in taking time to doing other things. So taking care of my mental health and well being, this really wasn't top of mind for me. Top of mind for me was work, family, responsibilities.

0:03:12 - (Adrienne Youdim): But again, giving yourself permission to take the time and space to do what you need to care for yourself, it really is a matter of permission. Ask yourself, how many times have you wanted to do something for yourself and yet have talked yourself out of it? Because it wasn't the time, or you didn't have the time, or you convince yourself that something else was of greater value or greater importance.

0:03:42 - (Adrienne Youdim): So the number one thing I think I do for myself these days is giving myself permission to live how I want and a way, or in a way that is aligned with my physical, mental and emotional health well being. And this is really predicated on the fact that it matters and I matter. So give yourself permission to know your own value. My second tip or intention for my own mental and emotional health and well being is managing my thoughts.

0:04:28 - (Adrienne Youdim): Now, in the past on this podcast, I've talked a lot about negative thinking and how that impacts our physical health, our emotional health. But my take on it today is a little bit different. And as I think back, my way of thinking has always been quite stubborn. When I have a thought in my mind, my notion has always been that I have to get to the absolute bottom of it. I have to figure out the problem, find a solution, or think through a problem to its entirety.

0:05:04 - (Adrienne Youdim): Really, like beat it to death before I let it go. And here's what I want to offer. We have thousands and thousands of thoughts per day, and not every thought. In fact, I would argue many or most thoughts are not valid. They are not worthy of excessive time and attention. Often these thoughts are negative thoughts, not only directed towards ourselves, but thoughts that just put us in a funk, ruminating over past situations, past conversations.

0:05:42 - (Adrienne Youdim): Why did so and so do or say that to us? It was a betrayal. It was uncomfortable, it was unjust. These repetitive thoughts have an impact on our mood and therefore our actions. And oftentimes this negative thought and vibe and mood isn't even contingent upon a real thought. Meaning, sometimes we just wake up for no apparent reason and we're in a funky and we say to ourselves, or think to ourselves, oh, this is going to be a painful day.

0:06:22 - (Adrienne Youdim): What I want to suggest is that as easy as our thoughts come, they can go, but only if we allow them to. So make an active attention or intention. Rather, to think upon a positive thought, or to change your thought process from something that is negative and ruminatory to something that's uplifting and positive. Think about something that's going well in your life. Some intention you have for the future, some gratitude you have for a friend or a family member or resources or functionality that you have.

0:07:05 - (Adrienne Youdim): Hey, we woke up. We're breathing, we're functional, we can move. We take these things for granted. But if you think about it, we really shouldn't. There are so many people right now around the world, who are not free to live their lives with comfort and impunity. So make an intention to not let your negative thoughts stick. Let them pass. When you notice that a thought is not serving, you, allow yourself to let it go.

0:07:44 - (Adrienne Youdim): Perhaps it's as easy as just inviting for it to pass, or replacing it with a thought that is more uplifting, more energizing, invigorating, inspiring. You have agency here you are in the driver's seat, and you are able to navigate your thoughts in a way that enhances your emotional and mental well being. So do so. Number three is managing my consumption. And I think of consumption broadly, because consumption can be the food that we eat, the alcohol or the coffee or the substances that we may consume.

0:08:32 - (Adrienne Youdim): Consumption to me, is also information consumption, consumption of screen time. These are all things that, in essence, we are taking in and that we have, again, agency over. And they are all things that impact our mood. We know well that the food that we eat, the nutrients that we consume, has a profound impact on our physical health. There are literally hundreds and thousands of medical studies that show, for example, a mediterranean style diet reduces the risk of heart attack and stroke.

0:09:11 - (Adrienne Youdim): Five servings of fruits and vegetables a day reduces your chance of certain cancers, including colon cancer. Two servings of fish or omega per week impact and enhance your cognitive health. I could go on and on and on about the studies that show the benefits of food to your physical health. There is just as many studies linking and creating associations between food and your emotional or mental health and well being.

0:09:45 - (Adrienne Youdim): I give this example often. Think about eating a donut. My entire first quarter as an undergrad at UCLA, I was on the donut diet. I ate a donut every single day. And guess what? I lost weight. I didn't eat anything else but your food. And I bring that up because your food is not only about weight loss. And just because you don't gain weight or because you lose weight doesn't mean that the food that you're eating is aligned with your physical or mental and emotional health.

0:10:15 - (Adrienne Youdim): What happens when you have a donut or a muffin, or some sugary, processed food for breakfast? Which, let's be real, most of our breakfast foods are sugary and processed. You have an initial high, a sugar high, followed by a crash. 30, 60, 90 minutes later, you feel lethargic, irritable, hungry, cravy, cranky. So your food does impact your mental and emotional health. We also know that certain nutrients are healthful.

0:10:50 - (Adrienne Youdim): So not only are certain foods impacting you in a negative way. But you can be proactive by incorporating healthy foods. For example, B vitamins. Your B vitamins are found in leafy greens. These are very important to your mental health and to your mood. Again, omegas. Omegas are great for the brain. Omegas primarily come from fatty fish, excellent for mood and for cognition. So good for your brain. All around.

0:11:25 - (Adrienne Youdim): Protein is very important for your mood because it helps sustain you. It is that nutrient that enhances satiety. So having protein every day so that, or every meal, rather, so that your. Your hunger or your fullness is sustained, so that you can focus on whatever task is requiring your attention. And then good carbohydrates, not the ones we talked about, like processed sugars that make you rise and fall in energy, or rise and crash, rather, but the ones that give you a sustained rise in energy.

0:12:04 - (Adrienne Youdim): Beans, grains, legumes, these kinds of carbohydrates give you a steady rise of energy, which propels you, which sustains you, which gives you the energy that you need to have clarity and focus in your work and in your interactions. So the food that you consume can either hurt you or can be to your benefit. Choose wisely. What about substances? So, caffeine is something that many of us drink to help awaken us. And actually, there are benefits to coffee. It is the number one antioxidant in the american diet.

0:12:47 - (Adrienne Youdim): But too much of a good thing is too much. And we know that caffeine can be stimulating. And the flip side to that is anxiety provoking. So manage how much you drink, how and when you drink it, because the later you drink the caffeine, the more likely it is to impact your sleep, which we'll talk about, which also has negative effects on your mental emotional health. Alcohol is another one. So, oftentimes, alcohol is considered a substance that helps take the edge off and thereby improves your mood.

0:13:28 - (Adrienne Youdim): Here's the thing. While alcohol will immediately have the effect of calming or sedating because it interacts with those same receptors of the brain as benzodiazepines. So think Xanax, Ativan. Alcohol is acting upon those very same receptors. And so, yes, in the moment, you will find a sense or achieve a sense of ease. However, the brain does not like to be sleepy. The brain does not want to be foggy at a time when it is not actually asleep.

0:14:07 - (Adrienne Youdim): It will react to the stimulation of these sedate receptors by then releasing counter regulatory neurotransmitters. These are chemicals that actually promote alertness. And again, this greater sense of wakefulness can also be perceived as a greater sense of anxiety and excessive stimulation. So be mindful that if you drink alcohol and you're initially, you know, sedated or feeling at ease, you may find that several hours later, you're awakened from your sleep.

0:14:49 - (Adrienne Youdim): Those are those neurotransmitters acting and impacting your REM sleep, getting you out of proper sleep. Some people get angry and irritable when they drink, and some people tend to feel more anxiety the next day. So think about how these substances impact your mood, your mental and emotional health and well being. My next tip to preserve. Oh, I forgot, sorry. Back to consumption. This is actually an important one, and one that is really hard for me to manage, and that is consumption through our phones.

0:15:28 - (Adrienne Youdim): I have to say, I am a screen monster. I am on my phone all the time. I check my emails a bajillion times a day, and I have increasingly relied on social media to keep me up to date with the news, which is absolutely horrible. There is nothing to be gained from this constant and incessant knowledge of what is going on in the world. Now, I do believe that it is our job to be informed. It is our job to bear witness.

0:16:08 - (Adrienne Youdim): So while some people do not have the luxury of shutting off from what is going on, it seems disingenuous and unfair that I could just shut it off. But at the same time, I need to manage my own space, my mental and emotional well being, so that I can do what is expected of me in a proper, clear, and healthful and intentional way. I have made a significant attempt at managing and mitigating my consumption of the phone.

0:16:44 - (Adrienne Youdim): And even when I'm successful for short periods of time, one day at a time, half a day a time, I realize how profoundly it impacts my energy and my mood. So if you are, like me, obsessively consuming content, give yourself a break and give yourself some boundaries, because I promise you that it is impacting your mental health in a negative way. And even small breaks will impact you in a positive way. You will notice the difference when you set even small boundaries around your phone consumption.

0:17:31 - (Adrienne Youdim): Okay, now I'm moving to movement. And guys, this, for me, is essential. I have shared so many times how exercise and weight loss need to get a divorce. And the reason for that, again, is not only is exercise not really important in terms of active weight loss, but more importantly, there are so many profound benefits of physical activity, particularly related to your mental health and emotional well being.

0:18:11 - (Adrienne Youdim): I think of negative mood and funk as this kind of kinetic energy that swirls around in my body. I can literally feel it when I'm distressed, when I'm agitated, I feel it in my jaw, I feel it in my shoulders, I feel it in the pit of my stomach. And that physical and visceral feeling also feeds my mind. Because even when I give my brain or mind a break, when I feel it in my body, then I start to think about it and ruminate about it and over it again.

0:18:50 - (Adrienne Youdim): It is this stuck circulating energy. When you exercise, when you move your body, you give an opportunity for this energy to get unstuck and to move through and out of your body. I literally can feel the energy dissipate. Not to mention, as you already know, the benefits in terms of serotonin and dopamine and all those feel good neurotransmitters that get secreted in your body when you exercise, they are actually chemical compounds that enhance feeling of well being and mental nourishment in your brain.

0:19:42 - (Adrienne Youdim): I know that when you're in a funk, sometimes the last thing you want to do is move your body. Oftentimes we don't even feel the energy. There's so much apathy, there's so much inertia that is connected with negative feelings. But what I want you to do is to commit. Commit to doing it. And then don't negotiate, you know, 110% that you are going to feel better on the other side. So don't try and get yourself to a place where you're doing jumping jacks and frolicking through the forest at the thought of exercising or moving your body.

0:20:27 - (Adrienne Youdim): You need to just acknowledge that you're going to be where you're at until you actually do it and get to the other side. Commit to moving your body and I'll just give you this anecdote. Several years ago, I was working with a business coach and oftentimes I would wake up and in a reactive state, I would shoot off an email already frustrated about this or angry about that, and I would send her an email and then I would go for a run because that's when I usually exercise and invariably would come back from my run and would say something like, disrecord.

0:21:11 - (Adrienne Youdim): My last email, it got to a point that it was so frequent that if I ever sent her an email before my run, she would ask, is this a pre run email or a post run email? And would defer to the second email before she actually responded. All this to say that this is an important part of my life because it is a tried and true practice. I know you know it, and if you're not doing it. You're not alone. Most of us are not.

0:21:43 - (Adrienne Youdim): But I want you to commit to movement as a way to dispense that negative kinetic energy out of your body and enhance your mental and emotional health and well being. My next regular practice is a writing practice. I have been writing in a journal since I was legit, seven years old. It is such a powerful and soothing practice for me, and people always say to me, well, what do you write? I don't know what to write.

0:22:22 - (Adrienne Youdim): And the best thing I can tell you is don't overthink it. This is not a manuscript. You are not necessarily submitting this writing. It is not for anyone else to read. It is not even necessarily for you to go back and to read. Use your writing as a place to just release. And that's actually one of the ways in which I write. I call it a dumping practice. It's just a way to dump the contents of my brain so that I can have a little bit more clarity, a little more ease, and less rumination, particularly before I go to bed.

0:23:03 - (Adrienne Youdim): So one way that you can write is by doing a dumping practice before bedtime. Write down whatever is in your head. It doesn't matter if it's silly, outrageous, redundant ruminating. Really. That's the point, to write whatever it is that's in your mind and allow yourself some clarity so that you are in a better position to get some sound, full sleep, and also to reduce ruminations. And writing practice has been shown to reduce ruminations and reduce the likelihood for feeling depressive and anxious sometimes.

0:23:45 - (Adrienne Youdim): Another writing practice is a gratitude practice. And this is not about toxic positivity, but this is about just identifying the things in your life that are good. And no matter how bad things are, things can be perceived and recognized for their goodness. I actually just finished an audible. The book is called signs. My youngest daughter's friend's mother recommended to me. It was a really beautiful book, actually, called signs, and she shared an anecdote by Sheryl Sandberg Sheryl Sandberg, the former CEO of Facebook.

0:24:34 - (Adrienne Youdim): She's also CEO of leanin.org dot. You may know that she lost her husband very early in their marriage. He was young because he had a heart attack, unexpected while he was exercising on the treadmill. She had young kids. And how devastating to lose your partner abruptly and unknowingly right without any warning sign or reason. And it was shared in this book that when she was in the depths of her grief and her despair, a friend shared with her that, you know, have gratitude for how it could have been for how it could have been worse.

0:25:19 - (Adrienne Youdim): And even hearing this anecdote in this audible, I thought to myself, ugh, I mean, let the woman grieve, right? How could it be any worse? But then the friend shared with her, imagine if your husband had had that heart attack while he was driving your children. And Cheryl Sandberg actually described this in a commencement speech she gave for a college graduation. And she said that at that moment, she felt such a sense of gratitude for the health and the safety and the presence of her children.

0:26:01 - (Adrienne Youdim): So there are ways, there are always ways that we can have gratitude. Spend some time every morning leaning into your life with gratitude for your health, for your resources, for your functionality, vitality, energy. These are things that I always give gratitude for, for the people in your life that you love, that we often take for granted, our partners, our children, our friends, our mothers, our sisters and brothers.

0:26:35 - (Adrienne Youdim): Give gratitude for the work that you do, that you're able to do work. And if you're not working, for the freedom to choose something different, for the sun that's shining, for the nature that's outside your abode, for the abode that you have, that you can live in so many things. And I don't want to taint your gratitude. Just start by engaging in it. Start by writing three, five, and if you're really gunning ten things every morning that you feel grateful for, and then round out your evening with a dumping practice.

0:27:15 - (Adrienne Youdim): And that's a great place to start with your writing. My next practice for emotional and mental health and well being is being in nature. And this is not something that I always valued. I did not live in a family that really talked about being in nature or valued it. It really wasn't until a few years ago when I thought to go on a hike and realized how, how profoundly I was affected by being in the woods, by being in nature, and particularly around trees.

0:28:00 - (Adrienne Youdim): I actually think the first time was when I went on a riding retreat in the redwoods. And it was the first time it dawned on me how positively impactful that energy state was, the energy of being in a forest wooded area. And then when I took that into a hiking practice, I recognized that it is such a way to be still present, grounded, and to create some clarity mind, really, a way to clear the mind of ruminations and thoughts and what we call the monkey brain.

0:28:45 - (Adrienne Youdim): So. And in fact, this is also, as I've mentioned in prior podcasts, this is really grounded in science. We know that the sight, smell, sounds of nature like the sound of a stream, the smell of plants, the sight of wooded trees, or a forest or an ocean actually stimulates parts of the amygdala, the part of the brain that is involved in emotional regulation. And this is predicated on a hypothesis called the biophilia hypothesis, which says essentially, that because our ancestors were out in the wild and required or relied on nature for their survival, we have developed this affinity or filia or love of nature and can use it to gain or obtain cues on how to navigate our own lives.

0:29:54 - (Adrienne Youdim): So if this is not something that you have done or engaged in, I recommend you trying it. Get out somewhere in nature that pleases you or speaks to you, and see how being still in that space impacts your health and well being. My next is sleep now. This is also something that I spent the majority of my life avoiding. I spent my life procrastinating, staying up late to study or finish papers. I was a resident.

0:30:35 - (Adrienne Youdim): We did not get good sleep during residency. My residency was interrupted or segued by motherhood. I had my first child while I was a resident. That only impacted my sleep further. I was the kind of person who liked staying up because that's when other people were asleep and I felt like I had alone time or I felt like I could actually get good work done. How many of you out there say that you stay up because it's your alone time, or you stay up because you're productive at that time of night? I cannot tell you how many of my patients neglect sleep and they actually substantiate that neglect of their sleep because they're being more productive.

0:31:35 - (Adrienne Youdim): I wanna tell you that your sleep is so critical not only to your mental and emotional health, but actually your productivity. So those of you who are neglecting sleep in a pursuit of greater productivity, spoiler alert. You're not being successful in that attempt because sleep is a time that we actually solidify memories and learning. When we get good sleep, we actually retain the information in a more usable way.

0:32:10 - (Adrienne Youdim): So if you're spending your sleep time cramming for an exam or getting ready or prepared for an important meeting, you're failing on that attempt. Sleep is also critical to our focus and to our clarity. If you have a job in which you have to interact with humans, speak clearly, present ideas, lead a team, think up ideas, and be creative. All of these actions are enhanced by adequate sleep and impaired and impacted by poor sleep.

0:32:52 - (Adrienne Youdim): Not to mention that insufficient sleep puts you in a mental and emotional funk. The requirement, or the goal is a minimum of 7 hours per night. If you are an adult. It's more if you're a child or an adolescent. So see where you are right now. If you're really far off from that seven to nine hour mark, start giving yourself 30 minutes. Incremental goals of greater sleep. If you're sleeping four or 5 hours, shoot for five and a half.

0:33:28 - (Adrienne Youdim): If you're sleeping 6 hours, shoot for six and a half. And slowly get yourself back to prioritizing sleep, because it is critical not only to your cognition and to your function, but also to your mood and to your state of mind. If I didn't say it already, more sleep is associated with worsening ADD and ADHD, with anxiety, with depression. It does impact your mental health, so make it a priority. My next tip is, and we're on number seven.

0:34:10 - (Adrienne Youdim): Seven out of ten for my or the next. It's not even a tip. It's what is important to me. The way that I try and preserve my mental emotional health and well being is through connection. And again, this is yet another thing that I didn't do as a younger adult. It took really being in my forties to embrace so many of these practices. Connection is so very important. We know that isolation and loneliness is actually a negative impactor of our physical health, not only on our mental and emotional health, but our physical health.

0:34:58 - (Adrienne Youdim): We know, for example, that people who report greater amounts of loneliness have worse cardiovascular outcomes, are more likely to suffer heart attacks and other cardiovascular events. So connection with other humans is important. And again, as a working mother, I did not take time for friendships. It was just something that I thought was a luxury. To make time to go out to lunch with a friend was a luxury, and I had a lot of judgment about it. Who were these people who had time to spare? Who had that kind of time to spare?

0:35:40 - (Adrienne Youdim): But now that I'm older, I recognize that, first of all, connection with other humans don't just happen without work. It requires tending to. It requires cultivating. So take time to cultivate connection. And what I also want to say is that we don't only achieve connection and manage loneliness through connecting with other humans. Connection includes connecting to ourselves, connecting to nature, and to the world around us.

0:36:25 - (Adrienne Youdim): And so if those loneliness statistics makes you feel bad, and they do sometimes start just by connecting with yourself, engaging in a contemplative practice, being in nature, writing and journaling, meditating, praying, breathing, moving, stretching, some kind of practice that allows you to connect deeper with your own self. That form of connection is valuable and valid, too. Next is managing expectations.

0:37:09 - (Adrienne Youdim): And what do I mean by this. I think that sometimes we have these expectations that everything should be perfect, everything should be great. We should always be happy that that's a myth that's sold in the american culture, and also that things should come easily. Right? Like, I hear this a lot when patients come to talk to me about weight loss. So they look around at friends, and they have this false assumption that it comes easily to everybody else.

0:37:49 - (Adrienne Youdim): Oh, so and so. All my friends can eat whatever they want. They're not thinking about it. They're not constantly obsessing about it, and yet they have the body, the physique, the health that they want. First of all, I want to tell you, you never know what is happening in someone else's mind and somebody else's life. Trust me, as someone who is the keeper of many people's secrets, patients, family members, friends, and otherwise, you have no idea what other people are thinking and doing.

0:38:25 - (Adrienne Youdim): But for a moment, let's forget the comparisons and let's lean into this concept and explore this concept that it should come easy. Patients often tell me that they're frustrated by the slow and insidious weight gain that possesses so many of us over the years, whether it's during menopause or other life transitions, or maybe, again, it's just this slow and steady increase. But then when I ask them about, are you making time for your food, or are you cooking homemade foods? Are you going to the farmer's market, or are you meal prepping?

0:39:14 - (Adrienne Youdim): The most common thing I hear is, I don't have time. So many people rely on uber eats or an app to bring them their food, and they're not making time for it. And yet the expectation is that they achieve good health. Well, when we know that the average meal is not only high in calorie, high in fat, high in sodium, 2200 milligrams, almost your daily allotment in a single meal. And most of us are getting at least one meal a day, if not more, from the outside.

0:39:59 - (Adrienne Youdim): How do you expect to maintain your health? The expectation should be that it is time consuming. The expectation should be that you do have to make time to eat high quality, high nutritious foods and that you have to have some role in preparing that food, or at least ensuring that it is available to you. You have to make time for sleep. You have to make time for moving your body. This excused. And I don't want to be judgmental about it, but the excuse that I don't have time just won't fly.

0:40:42 - (Adrienne Youdim): Because at the end of the day, your body doesn't care if you're overworking or overextending yourself or over caring for other people. They are all noble pursuits. But at the end of the time, at the end of the day, if you are not making time for yourself, to care for your body and for your health, then the expectation cannot be that you can achieve good physical, mental and emotional health and well being.

0:41:12 - (Adrienne Youdim): So again, this is going back to not only managing your expectations, but giving yourself permission to make the time necessary in order to tend to yourself and achieve your physical and mental and emotional health goals. Manage your expectations and give yourself permission. And I will end with this. And that is having compassion. Self compassion. So often we set goals for ourselves, fully intending to turn over a new leaf, to do things a different way, to start eating well, to start exercising, to be more present and mindful in our relationships and in our interactions.

0:42:09 - (Adrienne Youdim): And invariably, one day, one week, one month, one moment passes and damn, we find ourselves back where we were. This is part of the process. And I want you to take your limitations, and even if you want to call it failures, as a momentary blip, that is part of the process. If you can meet your limitations, if you can meet your failures, if you can meet yourself when you're stuck with a mind of self compassion, then you allow yourself in the next attempt to do it a different way.

0:42:59 - (Adrienne Youdim): You in essence, create resilience, greater resilience, to be more successful, more productive, to achieve that goal the next time around. And hell, it may take many renditions, and that is okay. As long as you meet yourself with a place or from a place of self acceptance and self compassion, you allow yourself to have a different outcome. This is a marathon, people. This life is a marathon. It is not a sprint.

0:43:42 - (Adrienne Youdim): So I hope that this has been helpful for you. I want to reiterate that so many of these practices are new for me. So I would say the Adrienne in her twenties and thirties was not engaging in these practices in a mindful way. It really took getting to this point to working with all of you, to even being a part of this podcast, and to doing the research for all of you that I have really made a commitment to myself because this one wild and precious life of ours is short and precious and valuable.

0:44:24 - (Adrienne Youdim): And you are valuable. And so I hope that you will go through this list in your mind, giving yourself permission, managing your thoughts, managing your consumption, engaging in movement, engaging in a writing practice, being with nature, getting sound and fitful sleep, connecting with yourself, with the world around you and with the people around you managing expectations and being self compassionate.

0:45:05 - (Adrienne Youdim): These are my ten take homes on achieving greater mental health and emotional health and well being. They are a work in progress always, but something that I try and keep top of mind. I'm going to send this out to you in a newsletter on Thursday, just as I do every Thursday. If you are not on my newsletter list, head over to the show notes and sign up. You'll also get a PDF on my five tips to living well.

0:45:42 - (Adrienne Youdim): And when you do get my newsletter on Thursday, I would love if you would respond back to me and let me know which one of these ten take homes really resonated and if you took the plunge into one of them, let me know how you did and how it felt. I can't wait to hear from you and to see you here again next week on healthbite. Have a beautiful, mindful, emotionally and mentally healthful week. Until then.

0:46:17 - (Adrienne Youdim): Bye now.